Things are not the way you dreamed for
by countegor
Summary: Helga, after years of suffering for love and attention, finally confesses her love to Arnold. And he accepts the facts. But Arnold is not the guy she thought he would be. Find out inside.
1. Chapter 1: Same old stuff

**Things are not the way you dreamed for**

_Summary: Helga, after years of suffering for love and attention, finally confesses her love to Arnold. And he accepts the facts. But Arnold is not the guy she thought he would be. _

She woke up, and immediately took a shower. She was tired of sweating every night and waking up thinking of him. As she opened the shower, she thought of her worst fears, her worst nightmares, that took her entirely, and every day was worse and worse. Why did she have that feeling that every moment she spent thinking of Arnold, her beloved, was a waste of time? She remembers him as the kind, goody two shoes, stupid football headed boy that held an umbrella over her head and liked her bow, when they both were 3 years old. Since then, she loved him, caressed for him, showed him her feelings by a hard mask of bullying, kissed him, stalked him. But 18-year-old Helga G. Pataki, recently Hillwood PS 218 High School graduated and most certainly having reaching adulthood and going to college, was still wondering if that was worth it now. Ever since he went to visit San Lorenzo and back, and he had his parents Miles and Stella back again with him, he's been a true mistery. Although she spent a bit of time wondering about Hillwood High, searching for his characteristic shaped head, it wasn't enough to find out what was ticking him right at the moment. Sure he spent time with Gerald but ever since he was distanced from Phoebe, being her the smart ass know-it-all she was, going to a private school and studying Physics, she couldn't get any information from him and less share a class and ask him, "Hey, hair boy, how's Arnold!". That would certainly bring out questions like "Why? Do you like him, like him?" or chirping "Helga and Arnold sitting in a tree".

Yeah, that kind of childish song was still around. And she didn't want to get out old Betsy, and have academic issues. Hell no, she was doing just fine! Getting straight A's like Olga, still writing poetry, she still had Arnold represented as a wooden statue in her room. But she still had this old habit of being the badass, to hide her true self. Everyone still feared her. And the worst part was, she had made no friends at all herself, which made her suffer a bit. She wouldn't go straight low like making friends with Wolfgang either, but she wouldn't befriend Lila or stupid Curly either. They were both so annoying. And they were together. Oh yeah, and to think Lila liked Curly. And Curly, being the annoying pro-disaster nerd he was, liked her too, and they started dating just to make Rhonda jealous!

She had excuses. She knew she had, to not make friends, to pass High School like it was nothing.

But she ached to tell him how she felt. Dr. Bliss recommended from time to time for her to practice at the mirror. Practice! Like if that was going to work! She could reach the big bathroom, that it was the only one actually having a mirror, step inside, start yelling an "I love you Arnold!" at her own reflection, then Big Bob would step inside too, yelling Miriam a "Where's my toothbrush and my coffee?!" and storm off, not without yelling her back a "Get down for breakfast, Olga!".

"It's Helga, Blob!", she would retort. She liked now calling her Blob, instead of Bob. At least would be a good hint for him to spell her name correctly for once and for all.

She dressed in a pink tanktop, blue jeans and a simple pair of white shoes. She did her hair in a bun, and marched down for 'breakfast'.

Breakfast was a piece of burned toast, thanks to Miriam sleeping on the couch forgetting to take them off a few minutes ago, and just coffee, again thanks to Miriam for not buying any milk. _Honestly_, Helga thought for herself, _those 'smoothies' are destroying Miriam, wonder what the hell is she mixing on them?_. It got worse since Olga stopped visiting and went on to marry a guy living in London. That was a good blow. Now they had the undesirable lamb only.

The only good thing about summer is that she would take a walk every morning, to not to listen Bob and Miriam yelling at each other and throwing things, like bottles and plates and having the house being a mess, along with the police calls about disturbs. That was a blessing she could avoid all that.

Just imagining them fighting.

"I HAVE TO GET TO WORK AND WHERE IS MY SUITCASE!?", Bob would yell.

Miriam would slur a "I don't know, honey… zzzz." She would fall asleep.

Bob would get mad at her and he would shake her. "WAKE UP, WOMAN! I SAID WHERE IS MY SUITCASE? AND MY LUNCH BOX?". Bob yelling again. "YOU DAMN GOOD FOR NOTHING!", He would drop her on the couch again violently then scream. "NOW I'M GONNA BE LATE THANKS TO YOU!". And then he would remember. "OLGA! OLGA?! URR.. HELGA, WHERE ARE YOU, YOUNG LADY?".

He would receive a blow to the head with his suitcase. Then he would receive another blow to the face with an empty lunchbox. "OW! Hey, my phones!", Bob would lament. A considerable amount of phones would be scattered to the floor.

"DON'T YOU EVER TOUCH ME LIKE THAT AGAIN, YOU HEAR?!", Miriam would yell. "I'm not responsible for your stuff! I'm not responsible either that Olga isn't here! So quit bothering me and get to work!". She would cry, like she always did.

"Why is that you always burn my food?! Speaking of food, where is my lunch box full of food?!", Bob asked, sarcastically.

"Go buy a slice of pizza or something, I don't care!",

"You useless piece-a-shit! Look at what you did with my cellphones! They were all new! This will be cut from your salary!".

"I'm not your employee!".

"Oh, but there's gonna be a salary!"

Helga watched from outside, hiding nearby a light pole, at how Bob yelled those last words, then took his car and drove off like a mad man. Miriam was out on the porch, grabbing her head with her two hands and sobbing.

"Looks like it's always the same thing every day, huh, Helga?", someone asked Helga from behind.

"Brainy, if you don't mind, stay out of my business!", she said as she punched Brainy in the face and left for a walk.

But Brainy, being the weird-o he was, wouldn't stop following her for some reason by popping out of every trash can. Helga still wondered how did he do that. "Oh, c'mon, Helga baby, don't be like that", he breathed, as he corrected his nose from the blow. "You know I like you, and care about you".

Helga smiled sarcastically. "Correction, dweeb, you know you like yourself and you follow me like a rat every day just to be with me. That's stalking, pervert.".

"Like you did, and actually try every day with Arnold?", Brainy asked.

Her eyes opened wide in shock. She sighed.

"_Touché_…". She turned around to face Brainy. She grabbed him by the collar of his shirt. "The thing is, Brainy, that I'm trying to profess my love for you-know-who, but I'm hopeless. There's no denying I fear he wouldn't return my feelings. I'm not good at showing off my heart either. So maybe, I should just move on and give up.". She tossed him.

Brainy almost fell out of the trash can. "So soon? You've got 18, Helga darling, you have all your life 'til 30 to tell him how you feel.". He sneezed.

Helga smiled truly this time, and helped Brainy get up. "You know what? You're right. Thanks buddy, but let me give you a piece of advice: stop being a creep". She kissed him on the cheek. "Oh, and get a bath. You smell.". He nodded, then he fainted. Helga simply shrugged and walked off.


	2. Chapter 2: What about Arnold?

**Things are not the way you dreamed for**

Summary: Helga, after years of suffering for love and attention, finally confesses her love to Arnold. And he accepts the facts. But Arnold is not the guy she thought he would be. Find out inside.

**II**

_**What about Arnold?**_

The room was a mess. Clothes were scattered everywhere. Food plates with finished chicken bones, some broken baseball bat, middle hanging posters of a known Hillwood rock band, the Destroyers filled the room. A Megastation Z was left alone with its connected 32" screen LCD TV, playing a demo of Immortal Combat. Through all of this, Arnold and Gerald were smoking pot. _Oh_, they thought,_ the liberties, having freedom for themselves_.

Gerald turned to watch Arnold relax with the weed and place his head over his pillow. "Arnold, ma' man, whatcha doin' on Sunday night?". It was a Friday.

Arnold lifted his head a bit, looking at Gerald in half-lidded red eyes. "I thought you were gonna say Saturday…", he drifted back to his pillow.

Gerald shook his head. "Nope. I said Sunday. Sunnnnday!", he slurred.

"Well, if you ask me, it's our…", he counted two with his fingers. "…second no-school-Sunday, so that would make it no school day… nothing I'm doing, I suppose then.". He shifted a hand to match it with Gerald in a high five, but Gerald was too dizzy because of the pot to really do it.

"I know what we can do! Let's go watch that new movie… What its name was?", he took his chin in his hands in deep thought. "Oh yeah, 'Monsters Monsters and More Monsters Part 3'".

Arnold waved a hand. "I'm in!".

"I'm buying the tickets, and I'll be here in Sunday to give yours, fifty-fifty like always, bro", Gerald said.

"Don't go too early 'cause you know I'm a party monster on Saturday nights", Arnold waved the other hand.

They laughed. Arnold, while laughing, made a sudden move of making love to the air, then waving his butt around like if he was dancing, then made a Michael Jackson move and then a dolphin one move, but he was too drugged to notice he was acting kinda stupid. Gerald watched while laughing hard at his friend. Sure the weed was powerful enough to make them imagine they were stars in a red carpet.

"Stop it, you're making me sweat from laughing, man!", yelled Gerald, gasping for air.

"Oh, you're just jealous 'cause I learned those moves from you then I perfectioned them!", Arnold put his hands over his hips, pouting in a matter-of-fact tone.

"Nah, I'm not jealous, dude, I'm cool. I'll go get the tickets and I'll call ya later.", Gerald said. As he was going to open the lock to go downstairs, he was stopped by Arnold and a sudden hand to his shoulder.

"Not so fast, hair boy!", Arnold said in a Helga-like tone attitude. He looked pissed off.

Gerald turned around, clearly confunded. "What the fuck, man?".

Arnold cracked open a smile. "You owe me a last Immortal Combat game! You're winning 2-3!".

"Sure, dumbass!", Gerald smiled. He strolled and grabbed a joypad. "You sure you want to get yo' ass kicked again?", he asked, before pressing Start.

Outside from Sunset Arms, in a nearby alley, Helga was hearing the noises of a strong fight, but she couldn't figure what was going on. She was just dedicating her last poems to her beloved, unknowingly aware of their current situation. She thought there was a struggle.

"**Arnold**!", that's all she thought of.

Without even knocking, she bursted through the Sunset Arms main door and headed upstairs where she already knew Arnold's room was there. In a sudden karate-like move, she kicked the door open and it smashed violently on the wall. Arnold and Gerald raised their hands, not looking back, closing their eyes, scared.

"We didn't know, officer, I swear!", Gerald screamed.

"Shut up, idiot!", Arnold yelled.

"Where did you get these stuff?", Helga asked, dumbfounded as she looked at the big screen LCD TV as two characters appeared on screen about to clash each other.

"The pot was on the streets, yo'!", Gerald screamed, just as a demo appeared again on the spot.

"Shh, you retard!", Arnold shushed Gerald. He turned around and he was about to do a speech, when he spotted Helga G. Pataki still looking dumbfounded at them. "Wha-What are you doing here?".

Helga blushed her cheeks. "Well, I heard some weird noises out there and I thought you were in—wait a minute. Did you said pot?!", she suddenly asked, alarmed.

"Baruj aka Ad'nai—", Gerald prayed, still on his knees, expecting Helga to beat them both to a pulp.

Arnold shook his head. "No, this idiot said pot, I said what are you doing here?".

"Well I thought you were in some kind of trouble, so I came to… see… if everything was…", Helga started. But as she looked at Arnold, she blushed furiously again. She shook herself, clearing her head. "I say if you assholes get caught smoking that shit you're gonna meet me as well as a witness, 'cause I wanna see your football headed shape in jail! Ha!".

With that statement, she closed the door, which creaked open again as she broke it. There Arnold stood looking like an idiot, watching Helga's back at the stairs, making another poem.

"_Oh, Arnold_! I'm an inconsiderate brute! How could I have abandoned you! Of course you would get turn around by smoking pot! I was the one who bullied you for years, and recently I found your beloved Grandpa Phil died! And I'm still treating you like dirt, even though I really—really—_reallyyyyy_…", she turned surprised around just to see her face to face with Arnold himself.

"What? You really what, Helga?", he asked, clearly pissed off.

She stepped back, almost falling from stairs. "Ahhh!", she was starting to fall off the stairs, wide-eyed and scared, when Arnold grabbed her hand quickly enough. "Gotcha!", he stated.

He pulled her up back again, and she was nose to nose with him. There she formed a sudden lovestruck look on her face, on which she did realize, and slapped herself before he could notice.

Arnold smiled, sheepishly. "So…", he rubbed the back of his hair.

"So…", she simply blushed and looked away.

"Weren't you going to say something?", he encouraged.

"Just-", she started, but she clam it shut. She turned around. "Forget it, Football-head. You're not gonna like it anyways". She started to leave, heading downstairs to the main door.

"W-wait, Helga!", he desperately ran downstairs, and he stepped in front of her body.

"What's the problem with you, buck-o? I'm leaving! I said you're not going to like my statement!", she walked past him.

Arnold stood, and crossed his arms on his chest. "Well, that's not true! I have ears. You still didn't spill it out!".

"Maybe… some other time…", Helga brushed it off, nervous at the main door, and not looking back.

"Just say it, Helga! Otherwise, why did you come here? Why is it your concern my Grandpa passed away? Why is it about you caring about my smoking issues? Why, Helga, why?", Arnold started asking questions, and turned Helga boiling hot as a tomato.

"Ok, I still **LOVE YOU** and your **STUPID FOOTBALL HEADED FACE** and all that concerns around you! Damn it! Criminy! There! I said it! Happy?!".


	3. Chapter 3: Promise me

**Things are not the way you dreamed for**

**III**

**Promise me**

He just didn't expect this. She, of all women, was humiliating herself and giving him her heart. There was no room for thoughts on his head. He just stood there, stupidly, with his mouth hanging open, without nothing coming out as a response. She waited for a few seconds, but as she got no answer, she sighed in dissapointment. Of course, who could judge him? She was Helga G. Pataki, none other. She suddenly smelled a horrible odor, which distracted her.

"Sheesh! Did a horse just pooped in here?", Helga asked, wrinkling her nose and waving her hand to get rid of the smell. She walked over to the window next to the main door and opened it. Then she opened the window next to the old TV set. She heard a loud thud coming from behind her. As she turned around, she saw Arnold sprawled over the floor, having fainted. "Arnold? Arnold!", she rushed over to her beloved. She shook him, repeatedly. "Arnold! _ARNOOOLD_! Wake up, my love!". She stopped, and dropped him to the floor again. He was fast asleep. Looking around everywhere in desperation, she remembered Gerald. She rushed upstairs only to find Gerald sleeping also, but on Arnold's bed. "Ugh! What do I do? I know! Phoebe!".

She found the house's old phone still attached to the wall, and immediately dialed Phoebe's number.

"_Answering! Hello?_", Phoebe said from the other side of the line.

Helga sighed. "Crimeny, Phoebe. I have a situation. Don't go robot on me now!".

Phoebe squealed. "_Helga! How are you? Konichua!_".

"There's no time for Japanese gibberish either! Come meet me at Arnold's place,_ pronto_!", Helga told her, slightly annoyed.

"_Coming!_", Phoebe's answer was.

Helga rolled her eyes. She hung up the phone and started waiting, hands crossed over her chest. She tapped a foot continuosly, but found it out useless. She started looking at her undid and unpolished nails. She sighed and looked around everywhere. She walked upstairs again. Gerald was still fast asleep, dropping spit all over Arnold's pillow. _So, this is Arnold's room, obviously after the tornado,_ she thought. The only thing interesting was the TV screen. _Meh! Big Bob could buy one of those if I just come up with an idea like that!_ she waved, as she dismissed the TV.

The front door closed suddenly, giving away Helga's attention.

"Helga?", a tiny voice called.

"Phoebe? Phoebe, oh thank God you're here!", as she said that, she rushed downstairs again.

Phoebe looked confused at her best friend. "Helga, what happened here? What is that smell? Why's **Ice Cream** on the floor?", she suddenly realized where she was even standing. "Oh, my goodness! Did something happened that made you come here as well?".

"Too much questions, little time. I'll tell you later. Help me carry him to his bed", Helga commanded.

Both girls carried Arnold upstairs to his room, and dropped him on the bed, perfectly curled beside Gerald. Helga decided to put Arnold's hand on Gerald's butt. "They look so peacefully gay!", Helga said out loud, laughing. Phoebe giggled a bit.

They both took a safe exit through the front door, even wondering why none of the existing boarders were making a fuss at the old house. Helga closed the main door, sat on the porch and motioned Phoebe to sit with her. Helga put her hands sustaining her forehead, in clear frustration. "Please, don't tell anyone, Pheebs, what I'm going to tell you, is strictly private, okay?".

"Recording for posterior deletion!", Phoebe said, just as a robot. Helga slapped herself mentally.

"Don't do that anymore, crimeny, Phoebe!", she yelled, exasperated. "Now listen carefully. Those two are high as shit and probably fast asleep. Eventually, Arnold won't even remember I… did… that 'thing'", she clearly put a special tone to the word 'thing'.

Phoebe squealed a "Did you actually kiss him? Oh, Helga! That's-".

Helga cut Phoebe, slapping a hand in her mouth. "**NO!** Well, I mean I just… kinda…tsk.. confessed my undying love for him today.", she admitted, looking down at the wooden floor, in dissapointment. She released her.

"But I don't get it. I seriously thought you beat him to a pulp. Why are you so sad, then?" her best friend asked.

Helga sighed. "Because he kept staring, drugged, looking at me like an idiot. And I'm glad he did, because, honestly, I'm just… Helga. Just effing Helga. I'm hideous!", she stated, matter-of-factly, raising and waving her hands above her head in desperation. "I also feel kinda responsible for his own stupid actions of smoking pot and behaving like if he doesn't even care about me and my stupid feelings.".

"Wait a minute, Helga, are you telling me he's in serious business?", Phoebe asked.

Helga nodded.

"Well then, this is odd. Why do you feel like that if he's just playing irresponsible? Helga, do you know the difference about people who make decisions and people who force other people to make decisions?", her best friend asked.

"What is with that nerd jibberish of you?", Helga asked, confused.

Phoebe slapped herself mentally. "Ugh, you didn't have anything to do with Arnold's decision, ok? In fact, if you do hang out with him, he will force you to take his irresponsibilites with you!", she warned.

Helga kept absorbing those words, without saying anything.

"In other explanation, he will force you to smoke pot, there's no denying. And considering your mom's own issues, I should warn you as best friend ever to better keep a good distance from him", Phoebe warned, dark seriously.

That warning struck Helga as a strong blow, like if someone would grab her heart and squash it with a soldier boot. She looked like a nervous wreck now.

"But… but-", she pulled her hair in desperation. "ARGH! I just CAN'T Phoebe! He's the only hope I have, the inspiration through all these years of suffering, after all the humiliation of being the black lamb of my family, the only one who gave me his advices, the only one I love with all my heart! He's been through so much, his Grandpa simply died only last week! And it stinks! And it is shit! And my life is shit, alright?!", she said, as tears started forming in her years. She sobbed, and cried her heart out.

She felt Phoebe's hug. Although she was a bit smaller than Helga, still the hug was powerful enough for her to appreciate the fact that someone still cared about her.

Phoebe hugged Helga a bit stronger, then she pulled away, a little, still resting her hand in her best friend's right shoulder. "Helga, I'm so sorry, but unless he's clean and promises he's never going to do that again, he's screwed for life, and you along with him if you follow. And know what percentage of people who desist on doing those actions again. At least a minimal rate of 2,1%. I really don't want my best friend to become a junkie just for some guy!".

Helga pulled away completely from Phoebe and stood up, pissed off. "Pff… _Some_ guy? Some guy?! You know we're talking about **ARNOLD **here, not some guy!".

"Oh, Helga, I know you're trying to defend his guts, but deep down, you know that I'm right.", Phoebe said in a serious tone, as she stood up also.

Helga sighed as she sat again, looking for other options. But what option could she take? His beloved was a screw up now. And that was painful enough for her. And the only idea of separating herself from him entirely was like separating from… a powerful drug. Realization hit her.

"What if I made him throw that shit away and make him promise he'll be clean from now on?", Helga simply asked.

"Will you be willing to take the risk?", Phoebe asked, concerned, looking at Helga straight in the eyes.

Helga nodded, a bit serious, but also a bit worried for her own sake. "Well, that's—of course I do, Pheebs! I love him very much, he's just… his football shaped head is just **SO** intoxicating, that I can't just let him go! I know that deep down, he can make a change".

"Ok, but don't go disappointing yourself, and please notice that I did in fact warn you", Phoebe warned again.

"I won't, Pheebs, trust me", she said, as she gave Phoebe the thumbs up. _Everything will be fine… I guess_, she thought for herself.


	4. Chapter 4: Confronting feelings

**IV**

**Confronting feelings**

_Tree hours later…_

Darkness. Complete darkness.

Slowly, Arnold started blinking, his vision all blurry. The first thing he had seen was the drooling face of his best friend Gerald. It took him another two blurry blinking to just realize in what position he was in. He opened his eyes wide in shock, when he saw that his own hand was touching Gerald's private parts. He let out a loud scream before he fell out of his own bed. He banged his head against the floor. That woke him up fully.

"OW! Damn it!", Arnold let out a groan. "What the fuck?!".

He looked at his Arnold shaped clock. It read 7.30 PM. He's been asleep too long. He rose from the floor to shake his best friend. "Gerald? GERALD!". He shook him more, and more violently. "Wake up, dude!".

Gerald let out a loud groan, and stirred. "Huh? Mom?".

Arnold scratched his head, and put his hands in jars. "Do I sound like your mom?!".

Gerald woke up, and stirred again. "Oh, it's you, Arnold. What's up?".

"What's up? What's up?! We fell asleep and we were both in my own bed, kinda touching each other!", Arnold said, desperatedly, and feeling embarrased.

Gerald blinked for a moment, and looked at Arnold's face, which was red like a tomato. A grin formed in his face. "Aaand… did you like it?".

Arnold let out a sigh, shaking his head. "Gerald, this is not the time for jokes. I don't even remember what happened.", he said to his best friend. "What if smoking pot turns you gay?", he asked, suddenly.

Gerald blinked again, surprised, and took a serious pause to think. "Uhm, not that I remember anyone I know turning gay at this point just for one week of getting high, yo'". A sudden memory flashed on his head. "Wait just a minute!", he raised his hand. "Are you sure you don't remember Helga G. Pataki bursting her own ass in here?", he asked.

Realization hit Arnold again. "Yeah… that would explain a lot. Actually, I kinda remember now she was concerned about my safety, and…". A sudden memory struck Arnold like a thunder. "Did she just—". He cut his own thoughts. He stood there looking like an idiot, processing all what happened between them.

Gerald looked at his friend. "Arnold?".

But there was no reply. His best friend was standing there, with a look of shock, and there was something else. Was it.. love? Gerald got up from bed and walked in front of a stupid looking Arnold with his jaw wide open and a lovestruck look in his face.

"Arnold? What's the matter, man? Yo'! I'm talking to yo' ass! Hello?!", Gerald waved a hand in front of Arnold.

"She… she loves me…. She still does…", Arnold let out a stupid smile full of teeth.

"She? Who's she?", Gerald asked, confused. "What the fuck's going on with ya?".

Arnold woke up from his sudden trance. He ran to the recently built new bathroom on the right side of the bed, muttering incoherent words. Gerald looked at his best friend in awe as he rushed to the bathroom, from there to the bedroom door cabinet to get some new clothes, to the bathroom again running with a soap and a pair of sandals. "A-Arnold?". Then he searched in a small cabinet for a pair of socks and a pair of new underwear. "Yo'! What the fuck, man? Slow down!". And without even answering, he went to the bathroom again, where he slammed the door shut. Gerald could hear Arnold turning the shower on.

"Whoa! Whoa! Are you going to take a bath? I'm right here, dumbass! Explain some shit!", Gerald asked, banging on the bathroom door.

Arnold opened the bathroom door, suddenly. "Igottaseehelgacausesheisinlovewithme!". With that said, Arnold quickly slammed the door shut again.

"What the fuck was that?! T-that-that wasn't even a sentence…!", Gerald stood, confused at Arnold's bath door. "Arnold!", he banged on the door again.

"_Helga! I'm coming, babe!_", Gerald could hear his friend scream.

"Do I sound like your girlfriend?!", he yelled.

The shower stopped. Arnold stepped out of the bathroom, naked, and pissed off, he stated a "She's not my girlfriend".

Gerald put his arms on his own built up chest. "And you're not having any clothes on either, bud", he pointed out.

Arnold looked down and, embarrassed, he felt the need to cover his own nudity with his hands. "Sorry". He bolted back to the bathroom, and stepped back with a towel around his private parts. "Look, Gerald, I would like to explain it all, but I have to see Helga. It's important".

Gerald stood there, looking at his friend as if he grew another head, and processing the information. "You… have to see… Helga G. Pataki?", he asked, slowly. He stood in silence. "Why?".

"Later, Gerald. Later. I'm running late. I'll give you a call", Arnold stated, slamming the bathroom door shut.

"You're a bold guy, Arnold, a really bold one.", Gerald said as he shook his head, and exited Arnold's room, as the shower was turned on again, and the bold guy could be heard singing.

_At Helga's front door._

Arnold stood up on Helga's porch with a bouquet of flowers in his hands. Not that he wanted to buy her some flowers, but he suddenly felt the need of doing it, God knows why. He was dressed in his Grandpa's old tuxedo with a black bowtie, and a pair of black shoes. He was wearing a Zenko cologne and a stupid grin over his face.

"Better now than never", he said as he joined courage to ring the doorbell.

"_WHAT NOW?!_", Arnold could hear a scream. The floor was trembling, with what it looked like big giant steps. It was like if a giant beast could suddenly attack him. He thought twice now about staying to look at the door or to back off. The door opened and Arnold didn't have the time to back off now, unless the owner of the house told him to. "YEAH?! OH, IT'S ALFRED!", the 'beast', or so it looked like Big Bob Pataki but much older and grumpy and a screamer. The depredator looked down at his possible new victim of dismembering.

Arnold face turned white, and trembling, he offered the flowers to Big Bob as he covered himself from any possible harm.

Bob looked at him, odd, and raised an eyebrown. He was now more relaxed, and Arnold sighed in relief. "What do you want?! And make it quick, it's Bingo night!".

Arnold joined courage again. "Mr. Pataki, sir, I came to see Helga. Of course if you don't mind, me, talking to her?".

"Oh, sure. Uhm, OLGA! YOUR FRIEND ALFRED IS HERE!", he screamed out loud, so the entire neighborhood could hear. Arnold was glad he was being called Alfred, so there would be no posterior trouble.

"_COMING, BLOB!_", Helga shouted from her bathroom position. The toilet flushed and Helga stepped out, with a piece of toilet paper stuck to her shoe. As she adjusted her pink dress, and her blonde short hair waved to the sides without its usual pigtails, she muttered incoherent blabbing and insults. But when she stepped on the porch and saw Arnold, the little color left in her face was gone. She stood up looking at him, shaking of fear. She started sweating. "Football Head?".

He smiled and waved. "Hello to you, too, Helga".

Bob shrugged at those comments and went back to what he was doing, watching TV. He screamed a "DON'T RETURN LATE, IT'S A SCHOOL NIGHT, YOUNG LADY".

Helga recovered her senses and screamed at his dad, raising her unibrow. "And since when did you worry about me getting late to school?!", she shouted back.

Bob grumbled in response, and dismissed her with his huge hand, while still watching TV. And with that done, Helga returned her gaze back to Arnold, who was smiling stupidly at her. Something was off.

"What the hell are you doing here, buck-o?", she screamed at him, as usual.

Arnold adjusted his bowtie, and coughed a bit. "These are for you", he said as he gave her the flowers.

Helga stood there, dumbfounded, as she received the bouquet of red flowers on her hand. She was astounded as how the guy was seemingly accustomed to her screaming and shouting and bullying. She felt a sudden lovestruck look on her face was covering her face, so she shook it, remembering to hide her bland side. She tossed the bouquet aside, crashing a china vase, and letting a "Yeah, yeah, whatever" from her mouth. She crossed her hands over her chest. "What do you want?", looking at him and adjusting her figure on the door.

"I wanted to know if you would like to... I don't know, hang out with me?", Arnold asked.

That took Helga out of her fighting mood, and she relaxed, standing again straight and her hands were no longer on her chest, but freely to her sides. She looked as if the world was playing a joke at her. Arnold wanting to date her? As in really, really taking her out on date? She shook her head.

"Who said I wanted to go out with you, and your stupid football head?!", Helga asked, suddenly angry.

"Well, why did you tell me those things back at my place?", he asked as nicest as possible.

Helga looked at him, shocked. _So, he remembered. But he was sure high_.

"I didn't", was her cut reply.

Arnold expected it, and shook his head. "No way you didn't. You bursted through my door and told me you cared".

Helga looked at both sides, for an excuse and a hole to put her head inside, then looked at him again, angry. "W-well, it's a free country Arnold-o, what did you expect? I can burst through your door if I want to! You know me, so it's not trespassing. Crimeny, I could be your guest", she said, angrily again, waving her hands in the air and avoiding the other question.

"But you said you loved me", was Arnold's immediate blurt.

Helga looked for a way to exclude herself. "Yeah, well, maybe you're delusional, 'cause I certainly didn't". She was nervous, and avoiding him.

Now he was pissed off. "Then why I do suddenly remember you talking about my late Grandpa, and you know it's been weeks since he died?", he asked.

"Idontknowwhatyourtalkingabout", was her freaked out response.

"And the fact that you love my stupid football head and everything around me".

"Doesn't ring a bell".

"Helga!".

"I don't have time for this", she yawned. "I'm going to bed and I expect you and your junkie ass to go away this instant!", she screamed at him before slamming the door in his face.

He realized her mistake as he banged on the door again. Helga opened to say "WHAT?".

"If it wasn't you there, then how come you know I'm a junkie?", he asked.

Helga now realized her mistake, with big wide opened eyes and nothing to come up as a response. _Damn_.

* * *

R&R, people. More coming up soon!


	5. Chapter 5: Go away, please?

**_V_**

**Go away, please?**

Helga slammed the front door shut, so that Big Bob wouldn't hear. Not that she cared, but it was important ever since he got so weird and more violent as fuck as years passed. She directed her eyes to Arnold, and Arnold stared back at her.

She sighed. "Good!… Er.. I mean, my bad! Hehe..", she started. She looked unseasy and unconfortable. "It's not that… I don't…", she said as she rubbed the back of her head before thinking the situation she was in. "I didn't want to say what I wanted to say… in front of you… with you, getting high. That's it!", she pointed out, grinning sheepishly at him.

Arnold frowned, confused. "So what if I got high?".

Helga quickly returned a "Doesn't count, buck-o!", putting her hands on her chest again and with an uncaring look on her face.

Arnold stared. "What?! Are you even serious?!".

Helga undid her uncaring look, and again raised her hands in the air. "Well, it wouldn't be fair! I mean, I was going to tell you… eventually! Someday... urg, maybe never", she muttered that last part, as she looked down. "BUT.. now that I've discovered that you're a junkie.. and I don't like junkies in my life, so—", but Arnold cut her off, putting a hand over her face.

"I get it! But let me get this straight…".

"Shoot!", Helga felt nervous, as she was still planning to get away as fast as possible from the start of this conversation.

"You can only tell me that you love me when I'm high?", he stated.

Helga looked at him, blinking for a split second. "That's not—", she frowned, pointing a finger at him. She realized. "Oh! T-that's the most stupidiest commentary ever, football head!", her insides churned, as she laughed hard at him.

"Well, then, what the hell is it?". Now Arnold was pissed off. Would she ever tell him the truth someday?

Helga stopped laughing, pretty aware this was serious. "You idiot! Of course I wouldn't tell you if you was high! I just wanted to get rid of you, so I told you those facts, no offense. But then again, it wouldn't be fair either. So I guess I just have to give you an apology and go back to my house", she explained.

"Oh, so you wanted to just get rid of me!", Arnold yelled, pretty pissed off, with his hands on jars.

Helga looked at him again, scrunching her face. "Yeah, whatever Arnoldo! Go to rehab or something! Just don't ever pest my porch with your stupid silly cigarette and get out of my face!", now she was going for the doorknob, and maybe call the police.

Arnold had had it. He was boiling in anger. "Damn you, Helga Pataki! I was just trying to be nice! I was going to tell you the same thing you did today!".

Helga stood there on the spot, surprised. "You what?". But she wasn't going to lose. She shrugged it off. "Why? Because my head looks just like the marijuana plant?".

Arnold blinked surprised at that comment. "Yeah…", he shrugged it off, as he realized. "I mean, NO! Because I think you're pretty damn awesome yourself! So just don't pretend you don't care that I love you back!".

Helga again was taken aback by surprise. She couldn't find the words. "Oh!".

He grabbed both her hands and did it. He kissed her. On the lips. With force. And released her at the instant. "Good night, Helga".

He was going to leave her, dumbfounded. He started making his way to his house, walking the few stairs on route to the Boarding House. She recovered, suddenly.

"Wait, Arnold!", she called. Arnold turned around, got back again at her porch and smiled at her. She slapped him. "Don't ever leave me hanging here, stupid football head! And this—", she slapped him again, "It's because I care about you deeply and you made me suffer through years, without realizing my true feelings!".

"Owchie, Helga! You have a good strike", he laughed.

She laughed, too.

But both stopped laughing and looked at each other. She suddenly felt uneasy, again.

"Look Arnold, what I'm going to say, if you want to get into a full relationship with me, you'll have to do as I say, starting now!", Helga started, feeling already uncomfortable.

"I hear you, Hell girl", he was laughing of joy, pretty full of himself now.

Helga frowned again. This couldn't mean something good was going to happen now. Was Arnold prepared for this?

She sighed heavily. "Arnold, this… this is not easy to me to say and… it is something you're not going to like. You see, we have a problem...", she started.

Arnold searched for words to understand her. "Oh...".

Helga raised an eyebrown at him. "Woah, buck-o! Before you missundertand, I'm not that kind of woman!", she said as she shot him a look.

He blinked, surprised. "NO! No, of course not. I wasn't even thinking about it!", he smiled, sheepishly at her.

She nodded. "Good for you!". She cleared her throat. "It's about this: first of all, quit the smoke, partly because it won't do any good to you, or to me either".

Arnold nodded, still confused. Why?

She sighed again. "Partly because my own house is full of addicts. First my sister Olga being so perfect, then my dad being a workaholic, then my mom and her damn", she put it figured, "_'smoothies'_ that get her drunk-like", she explained. "Now if I'm going to have a good boyfriend, he'd better be clean, you understand, right?".

He approached her. "Helga—".

She cut him off, a hand covering entirely his football shaped face. "Now I know you're gonna explode like all of the imbeciles that say 'I'm not going to do as you say!' or 'Don't try to change my life!', so I understand if you don't wanna quit and stay with your _'other'_ beloved-".

Arnold released himself and kissed her right on the spot. He was kind this time, and she didn't understand why yet, but she was loving the way he was surprising her.

"What was that for?", she asked, as they parted, then Arnold kissed her again.

"I love it when you care, you know?", he said as he kissed her neck and she started to appreciate it, as she was melting inside, her legs feeling like jelly.

When they got separated again, it took her some time to clear her mind, which was numb and, as they returned each other smiles, she stated a "Oh, what the heck?", as they returned kissing each other again. A few minutes later, and gasping for breath, Arnold extended her hand and she took it, as they started making their way walking through the cloudy night streets of Hillwood.

"You know what, Helga? I'm gonna do what you said!", Arnold clearly stated.

She looked at him, smiling dreamily. "Huh? What, football head?".

"The thing you told me, I'm going to rehab!", he told her.

Helga stopped walking and smiling, getting serious this time. "Y-yeah?", she rubbed the back of her hair. "B-because… you don't have to just go and do it all for me".

"No, I'm positive! I know I can go to rehab and in a few months I'll be as good as new!", he smiled at her, pretty convinced it was easy.

Helga smiled uneasily at him. "Are you sure? You're gonna loose it if you ever go to rehab. They'll make you suffer from what it's called abstinence or something at first. Then there's counceling sessions with other junkies and faggots, you know, that kind of stuff I've seen in documentaries and movies.".

Arnold stared at her. "How do you know all that?".

"Hey, don't get any wrong ideas, Arnoldo!", she stated, angrily.

Arnold thought for a good joke. "Don't worry, princess, I've got my taster buddy to smoke all the pot cigars for me, my ol' good friend and buddy Gerald!".

He said it as if it was easy for him. What was going on, and why was he so childish?

"Are you kidding me, dumbass? Do I look like a 3-year-old to you?", she stated, angrily.

"What?", he asked, shrugging.

"Gerald? Oh, puh-leaze! With that attitude, you're going to make Gerald look at you while you hungrily go for a cigar to another, I can hardly imagine you recovering for that. And second of all, why are you still friends with funny hair boy, if he's making you take drugs?", she asked.

He shrugged again. "I dunno, because he's fun".

"Yeah, fun as in the **bad** way".

"Fun as in funny way, Helga, as the way I look at it".

She shot him a death glare. "Look, if you're going to behave like this, then your promise or whatever you said to me is shit. Go mature or something, buck-o. As I already told you, I have no more room for addicts. I'm going home!", she said, as she turned around and walked again to her house, leaving Arnold alone, as he threw his baseball cap on the floor and groaned.

* * *

R&R people! More coming soon! Cheers!


	6. Chapter 6: Decisions, decisions

**_VI_**

**_Decisions, decisions…_**

As she walked home, she thought it twice before going back to her house. The whole idea of abandoning Arnold to his own luck was literaly destroying her from the inside. Besides, she wouldn't want to return and have to talk to her father about it, because that would mean Big Bob in response telling her to look out for another boyfriend who could provide for the family some benefits and someone who would be sober and clean, and promising he would straighten up Arnold for good, as in the Pataki language, straighten up would be a serious discussion with fight and insults and possible beat up. She glanced at her watch on her left wrist, which read 9.30 PM and sighed. She decided to continue walking until she found the nearby trashcan and started receiving inspiration for her next poem about Arnold. She traced for her heart shaped locket with the picture of her eternal beloved located in her prominent chest and looked at it with a glare, then softened. She smiled as her

"Oh, Arnold! What have I done? Why, oh why you decide to act so childish, so immature! When I last thought about you, you were the only one I knew with brains and a good heart. But it is now consumed by a horrible addiction, and it doesn't let you think about the consequences! Don't you know how deeply I care and want you to become a better man? The circumstances, I get them, but that doesn't mean any reason for what—".

She was suddenly cut of by the sight of two figures talking in the alley.

"_You got the **shit**?_", said one guy. His voice sounded familiar.

"_Yeah, but it's gonna cost ya_", said the other.

"_No problemo, just hand it to me_".

"_That'll be like always, a thousand_".

"_Here you go, it's good making bussines, yo'!_".

"_Hehe, sure, brotha, smell ya later!_".

Helga kept herself muted until she spotted a figure walking just towards her. It was a tall man, with a round head, bald, dark skin, wearing a sweating shirt and a pair of baggy blue jeans. He was also dragging a bag of weed along with him. Helga frowned in rage and approached the guy and literally destroyed whatever form was of his face with the brutal force of a single punch. The guy fainted on the floor from the impact. She kicked his torso while on the floor just in case he woke up and put a foot on one side of his face to reach the light to try and recognize him. She dropped her foot from his face, awestruck that she hit none other than Gerald Johanssen. She suddenly boiled in anger, more and more. Gerald was partially responsible for Arnold's antics. She kicked him again, and again, while he was unconcius, releasing her frustration.

"_I see you're having fun!_", a voice called from the trashcan.

Helga immediately stopped kicking Gerald and froze. "Who's there?".

"You cannot tell by my respiration on your neck?".

She rolled her eyes. "Brainy, it's been forever since you cured your asma and social issues, well, partially, and became a fairly decent guy!", she looked at him, who was behind her, smiling stupidly and not answering, and shot him a glare. "Well, almost a decent guy. I told you to stop being such a creep!".

Brainy returned the look and pouted. "But it's just so fun hearing you talking about your impossible beloved Arnold!".

"What part is so fun to you? That you want to achieve being Arnold so you can just grow a football head and start giving advice to others?", she asked, smiling sarcastically, as she put her hands over her chest.

"If I was jealous of the guy I would tell, silly", Brainy responded, putting a hand on her shoulder, which she shrugged it off. "What's on your mind?".

"Well, just so you know, I'm trying to drop the whole concept of 'I love Arnold' to the trash", she explained, as she turned around to face him. But being depressed as she was, she looked at the floor.

Brainy suddenly grew interested and more focused. "Why?".

"Why? Because the guy is just a complete imbecile! He needs help but he doesn't get he should get it, and lies to me about recovering quickly of his own problems! I've never seen him so idiotically childish! Like this guy on the floor, for example", she turned to face Gerald, still fainted on the floor, and took the bag he was holding from his hands. "I thought Arnold was indeed joking, at first, but I quickly realized his true intentions".

"Which are…?", Brainy asked, confused.

"Oh, didn't I tell you Arnold is not the guy I dreamed anymore? He's a total mess, his house smells and he's spending time with this guy and her other beloved one!", she said, agitated, throwing her hands in the air.

"I bet he still has the hots for Lila?", he asked, still getting nowhere.

"No! This 'other' beloved!", she said as she showed him the bag.

Brainy gasped. "You serious? Wow… I've never thought he'd—".

"**YES! I KNOW!**", Helga yelled at the top of her lungs at him for no reason. She sobbed. "All these years of mourning, and living like crap, and being rejected by my own folks, and the only thing that was positive in my life that was Arnold, now is crushed when I find now that Arnold's a junkie bastard with no possibility of a cure!". Tears flowed from her blue eyes. "What else is going to come? What now?!", she screamed high at the dark night sky.

Before Brainy could answer, a voice groaned suddenly. Helga froze.

"Did you take the plate of the truck—", the figure sat as he took his head and groaned again in pain as he put his hand over his mouth. _He woke up! I'm screwed! I'm dead, dead dead deadly... cooked...,_ she thought for helself. Gerald shook his head and first looked at Helga, and his bag, with a glare. "Hey! I can see ya! Give me back my stuff, whoever you are!". _He doesn't see who I am? Great!_, she thought again, looking at both sides for a quick escape.

Brainy, being the scrawny coward he was, hid in fear inside the trashcan.

She looked at the bag in her hand, and back at Gerald. "In your dreams! I'm keeping this! Or you can tell your sorry ass goodbye when I call the police and they put you in jail for possession.".

Gerald pulled out a knife, and smiled knowingly. "You have 5 seconds to leave the shit or run, miss!".

Helga smiled too. "Not if I punch you so hard that you will wake up the deads!".

A fight soon ensued. Helga grabbed Gerald by the wrist and made him scream in pain as she cracked it. He dropped the knife. Gerald grabbed Helga by the waist and dropped her violently to the trashcan, revealing Brainy was still there when the trashcan fell from position. Helga resumed her fighting by trying a full dose of Old Betsy's and Five Avengers at Gerald's face and stomach, which worked. Gerald tightened his grip on his face, when he saw the knife at his right. He was about to grab it, when someone else with a flashlight on his hand put his foot on it.

"_Would someone tell me why the heck are you two fighting?!_".

"Helga?!"

"Doi, idiot!".

"Shut up and answer my question!", Arnold's angry mood told them.


	7. Chapter 7: Separate ways

**VII**

**Separate ways**

Helga and Gerald blinked a few times. They've never heard Arnold so angry. And when Arnold was angry, you had to take care of yourself and think the words carefully to respond. Except Helga, of course. Helga could be angry all the time, and take no responsibility whatsoever, at any time and any place. That was a good advantage for her. She just shrugged at Arnold's mood and dropped the contents of the bag into the nearby trashcan, at the astounding look of the two. Arnold directed the flashlight at her, then at Gerald.

"**WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING, WOMAN!?**", Gerald yelled, desperatedly.

Helga scoffed. "I'm doing you a favour, buck-o! Or would you better like responding to the cops because you tried to kill me over a thousand dollar bag of shit?".

"He did not-".

"Oh, cut the crap, Arnoldo! Look at the dagger at your foot!", Helga screamed.

Arnold removed his foot and found a little toy knife. He took the handle in his hands. "What? This? It's just a toy, Gerald would never, ever harm anyone". He showed her it didn't even slice.

Helga's jaw dropped, but resumed composure. She put her arms in jars, as she raised an eyebrown. "You mean to tell me Gerald's a big fat loser, after all this time?".

"HEY!", Gerald screamed through teeth, tears in his eyes. He was still mourning over his lost bag of weed.

"I still can't believe it! You still are on his side! You know he could've really actually kill me if the knife was real!", Helga yelled at Arnold.

"No, no! I didn't thought that way!", he replied, waving his hands in defense.

"What? Am I not good enough for you? Maybe you will defend fucking Lila? Is that it?", she grabbed him by the collar, and dropped him to the floor.

Arnold coughed. "What... does... this have anything to do... with Lila?".

Helga blinked, as she realized she made a mistake. "I... just... had to prove a point!", she shrugged.

"Oh, I'm gonna prove mine-!", Gerald suddenly started struggling with Helga, trying to find both his arms to her neck.

Arnold looked at the struggle, but he didn't want to intervene, he was still pissed off. Even though as she elbowed Gerald's face many times, and the last's screaming in pain, she didn't look too good. And when he started to see Helga's face turning blue, he gasped, as he yelled a "STOP IT!", blinking many times his flashlight, and finally pulling his two struggling best friends apart. Helga was on the floor, kneeling and gasping for air, as Gerald was cleaning up his nose and keeping it from bleeding again.

"Are you ok?", Arnold asked, really concerned, as he kneeled beside Helga and put a hand over her shoulder.

Helga scoffed, and pulled Arnold's away. "Go to hell! And I thought you were a goody-two-shoes! But in reality, you're a fucking sissy!".

"Helga-", Arnold started, but he was cut off.

Helga put a hand over his face. "No! You'll have to fix this, Football Head, on your own, or you'll never see me ever again!". And with that statement, she left, walking a bit lightheaded, as she turned left and dissapeared.

Arnold looked like an idiot at the figure disappearing through the cloudy night.

"Well, good riddance!", Gerald said as he clasped his hands together.

Suddenly, Arnold snapped at his future former best friend. "Yeah? Well, good riddance to you too! I hope I see you in hell for what you did!".

Gerald looked at Arnold like if he grew a second head. "What? What did I do?!", he shrugged.

Arnold turned to see Gerald, as anger boiled inside of him. "First! You induce me into that shit of yours, then, you hook me up with Lila, knowing she turned a slut over the years, and next, you try to kill Helga. Damn it! She was right!", he put his hands over his head. "Argh! I can't take it anymore! I'm going to rehab!".

"But what-?! Why?", Gerald asked, still absorbing the information.

Arnold started going away. "I don't know, Gerald, you just tell me when you feel you hit the bottom. I expect you to go to rehab soon".

Gerald looked at his friend go, with a dumbfounded expression. He shook his head. "Bold guy…".

* * *

As Helga tapped her recently broken wrist watch on her left hand, she reached the front door of her house. Tears escaped her eyes suddenly as she reached the doorknob and stood inside. She thought it was too late to escape Bob's screamings and yellings. But she found her house the usual mess, and snorings coming from the living room. The TV in the living room was still on but no signal displayed, and Bob was sleeping on the couch with his mouth open and dripping saliva, a can of beer in his hands staining the floor. Miriam was on top of the couch seat, also sleeping, her butt offering Helga a good view and a sudden suggestion of kicking it. But her thoughts were on Arnold, and her broken heart. Her recent fight raced her mind as she dragged her feet over the stairs and to her room, crying. She was worn out, as she stepped inside and collapsed on the pink bed. Maybe she could think things through in the morning, as she still had to do her college inscriptions. She was accepted at University of Virginia to apply for Arts, and she was definetly going to accept the fact she was leaving to campus in two weeks to check the facilities. The only thing from keeping her going away was her beloved… if her beloved knew what she was going through…. And if he was not such a dork for letting Gerald put a hand on her! Anger grew inside her at the thought. She shrugged it off, as she closed her eyes and found the much needed sleep.

* * *

R&R people! More coming soon...


	8. Chapter 8: Deserted

**VIII**

**Deserted**

Helga woke up startled by the sound of her own dad banging on the door.

"_**OLGA!** Answer the door! I'm starving!_".

She quickly put her pajamas on and opened the door just to find her dad with his arms on his chest and looking menacingly. She yawned, and scrubbed her right eye.

"What do you want?", she just asked.

Big Bob roared, giving Helga a blow of wind and saliva to her face. "I'm hungry! I need to eat and your mom's not here!".

"What do you want me to do about it?", she asked again.

Her father snarled a, "KITCHEN! **NOW!**".

Helga blinked a few times, understanding the situation. "Oh, so YOU want ME to cook you breakfast!", she laughed sarcastically. "I'm not your maid, you know that!", she put her arms on her chest, doing more than to anger her father. He practically was boiling red. But Helga didn't move a muscle. She was just as stubborn as her father, so it would take time to put her on a maid dress before she was eating ice cream with Phoebe.

Big Bob's anger stopped suddenly, revealing wisdom and trickery. "So…", he cleared his throat. "How did it go last night?", he asked, as he was still forcing himself not to crush his own daughter's neck in his hands, his knuckles white from pressing his hands firmly into fists.

Helga looked surprised at him, disarmed at the question, but she couldn't respond. She started to get nervous. "I…uh…well, it didn't…you know…work, actually", she dismissed it with a sheepish smile.

Her father raised an eyebrown and put his arms over his chest again. "Really? What happened?".

She shot him an uncaring look. "Doesn't even matter…", she shrugged.

"What time did you get here?", he asked, uncaring look.

"Twelve", she responded.

"You sure?", he asked in case she was lying.

"Actually, I found you last night sleeping on the couch with the TV without signal and Miriam in an interesting position, dozed off", she said, as she put her arms over her chest again, still uncaring look.

He blinked for a few seconds, surprised, then smiled. "Sounds about right. You're punished, young lady", he stated.

"Dad. I'm eighteen.", she stated.

"My house, my rules. I told you to get back at eleven. Now, go to the kitchen if you want to get rid of the punishment", he stated.

She cursed under her breath, but accepted the consequences. She was heading downstairs, until he snickered, triumphant smile on his face. "Just so you know, nobody beats Big Bob Pataki!".

Helga stopped right in her tracks, just to turn around an give him a good answer. "Except **death**…", she mumbled, pressing her teeth together.

Big Bob's face drained out of color. His smile faded. He now looked disarmed. The whole idea of trying to beat death was painful enough, and she knew it. He had two heart attacks in two years, trying to cope with overwork and changing his beloved beepers to new technology, cellphones and tablets, and notebooks, and resolving a non-existent economic crisis.

Now she smiled triumphantly. "Don't worry, Blob, I'll make something without cholesterol". She laughed.

* * *

Half an hour later, Miriam came home and went inside the kitchen to find Bob at the table, shaking, scared, still trying to get his yogurt past his mouth. His breakfast consisted on the same yogurt, diet crackers, a small coffee latte and a small piece of vanilla cream cake. Loving the view of Bob suffering was Helga, smiling devishly, enjoying her delicious honey pancakes, all done by herself. Miriam dropped the few supplies she brought from the supermarket, including a small bottle of vodka that was suddenly appearing and disappearing from her coat as she moved fast, and turned to assist her husband.

"Oh, honey! Did she do this again?", she asked, placing comforting hands on Bob's shoulders.

Bob only nodded, still messing with his yogurt. Miriam turned to frown at Helga, who frowned back.

"Helga, how many times I've told you to leave your father's medical crisis alone?", Miriam slurred.

Helga acted as if she was pondering the question. "Mmmmm… I guess it's the first time".

Miriam suppressed a hiccup, covered by exaggerated surprise. "Oh no, I'm sure I told you before! I guess…".

Her daughter gulped a pancake and replied a "Just shut up and join me to eat pancakes".

Miriam just sighed. "Okay, I guess I could eat a few…", she slurred again, dragging her foot to take a plate, just when Bob recovered his own mind.

"She's the devil, Miriam! She's got power over us! I say we get rid of the damn thing!", he screamed as he punched the table and got his pants and shirt dirt of yogurt. Helga rolled her eyes at her definition of 'thing'.

"Whatever you say, sweetiee… zzzz", her wife said as she fell asleep, her face on her pancakes.

Helga choked on a pancake. "Look, Blob! I only got two weeks to get my ass out of this damn house! If you don't like it, I get it, but just don't even think about fucking my vacations!".

Bob took the offensive, knowing with a smile that her daughter was scared of being thrown away so soon. "Is that so? Then you should be thankful you're going away, we spent too much effort in you!".

Helga raised an eyebrown. "If you mean studying, I didn't need help, I had thirteen years going to school on my own. If you mean money, I've got a full scholarship and everything paid off, something Miss All Perfection _Olga_ couldn't even achieve. And if you mean you guys are terrific parents, well… newsflash!", she screamed aloud, dropping her fork. "You guys seriously need teraphy!".

Bob was lost at words. It took him a few seconds to shrug it off, determined to get rid of his own unwanted daughter once and for all. "Well then, what are you waiting for? Go live your life! The only thing I ask you for is a good breakfast and you treat me like some kind of… pig! What is this? Yogurt? Who does eat yogurt!", he was boiling red at the sight of his pants. "Damn it, get the hell out of my house!", he commanded.

Miriam woke up. "Can I come toooo…? zzzzzzzz". she placed her head over her pancakes, staining her hair and face in honey.

Helga jumped from her seat. "Damn you! Who needs you and your stupid yelling?! I'm going to my room to get my stuff!", she screamed.

"I'll personally check there's not even a single remnant of you in this house!", he screamed and punched the table, now dirtying himself in coffee.

Helga pulled a big bag and placed her clothes, her diary, her old locket with Arnold's picture in it, and some make up her sister Olga left for her and never used. She went to her parents room and pulled a wallet from one of Big Bob's pants, and took the money in it, without even caring she threw the pants over the window to fall in a bald guy's face. She dragged her bag through the stairs, and headed to the main door. She opened it, just to receive a huge screaming from the kitchen, "AND LEAVE THE KEYS!".

Helga screamed back a "I'll leave them to the mafia, maybe they will like this house for a poker reunion!", and with that, she closed the door behind her.

Realizing she was now homeless, she dragged her feet and her bag to the nearby alley to cry in loneliness.

* * *

R&R people! More coming soon!


	9. Chapter 9: Goody-two-shoes to the rescue

**IX**

**Goody-two-shoes to the rescue**

It wasn't as if she wanted it to happen. She already knew they would kick her out of home when she would be adult enough. And when she meant 'they', she would mean both parents. Because Miriam was drunk enough to protest, she assumed her mother was consenting. She gritted her teeth as tears ran freely, as she curled in a ball in the cold, hard floor, thinking about what happened and mourning over all those years of neglectful parents and lack of support. Sure her old friend, psychologyst Dr. Bliss would hear about this, not that she cared enough to hear because now she's only treating scholars and not adults, not that she would give it a try. She reached for her cellphone and dialed the numbers, only to find out she was out of battery.

"Great! I can't even call Phoebe!", she cursed. She remembered she left the battery charger in her room.

She groaned, and stood up, again dragging her now heavy bag. The only thing she could do was to get help from someone she knew he had an old phone in a counter. Arnold. But why would she even go to his house to use his phone, when last night she ditched him and told him to fuck off? She sighed, thinking of poor Arnold, being alone, without any company at all, his grandfather died two weeks ago and she behaved like such a shit to him. As always, she wouldn't care about him, so why would he care? She shrugged her thoughts, swallowed her dignity and dragged her bag and herself to the only place she knew she would use a phone, call Phoebe, call Dr. Bliss, kiss… errr… talk Arnold goodbye and leave.

"I could use that as a good excuse…", she muttered.

She reached Arnold's front door, and knocked. The door opened to reveal two pigs squealing running past her, a duck following scared, a chicken leaving feathers everywhere, and a dog chasing and barking. The figure of Arnold with a black eye on his face stood face to face with her.

"Helga?", he asked, surprised to see her.

Helga looked more worried at Arnold than of herself. "Oh my God, football head! What the heck happened to you?", she asked all of the sudden.

Arnold pointed to his black eye. "What? This? I ran into Wolfgang last night when they asked me about Gerald's weed. I told them I didn't have any and that I was throwing myself into rehab, so they mocked me and punched the shit out of me", he explained, as he showed her an improvised cast over his left arm.

Helga's heart skipped a beat. "You… you actually… I mean, are you really going to rehab?".

Arnold shrugged. "I always knew you cared".

Helga shrugged also. "I thought you were joking…".

"I thought it was a good joke, but because I was nervous and in denial, and I didn't take it seriously at first. Then when Gerald's fight with you happened last night…", he explained.

She felt uneasy. "Yeah… about last night… sorry for being so tough to you, Arnoldo, I just… after all you've been through, I didn't want another issue in my life. I was…", she sighed heavily. "…selfish", she explained, as tears rolled her eyes.

Arnold gasped. "Helga! Are you _crying_?!".

"No, it's allergies, football head! Of course I am! I nearly lost the most precious thing to me in the world and now that I've been—", she clam her mouth shut, thinking carefully about her situation. She didn't need him to pity her. "I… can I come in and use your phone? I'll explain later, alright?".

Arnold raised an eyebrown, looking puzzled, but opened the door for her. "Sure, come on in".

"Thanks", she said, as she dragged her bag, and placed it carelessly inside. She went over to the old phone at the counter and dialed a number. Arnold watched her as she put the receiver on her ear. "Hello? Dr. Bliss?! Yeah, this is Helga. Helga G. Pataki?! You remember me, don't you? No, not Telma Salami, Helga Pataki! Argh… damn** car accident**!". She groaned and cursed as she hung up the phone. Arnold wondered seriously about who was Helga talking to. He stopped wondering when she dialed another number, and put the receiver on her ear, while looking at him now. "Phoebe?! Oh, thank God you're there! Listen, I need your help!". She waited the answer. She frowned. "What do you _mean_ you're not available?", she yelled to the phone, as she looked at it imagining choking her best friend. "Look, I don't care if you have **AIDS**, I'm…!". She sighed. Arnold jumped at this comment. But Helga dismissed her comment off at him with a wave of her hand, and he sighed of relief. "Ok, fine! Just get better, ok? Yeah, yeah. Bye!". She hung up the phone, cursing again, and looked back at Arnold. "What?!", she demanded.

Arnold rolled his eyes, and sighed. "Nothing…".

"Oh…", that's all she could reply, still holding the phone receiver in her hand.

"Listen, if you… need something, just tell me, I'm still available", he said, as he rubbed his neck.

"Well… actually, I was hoping—errr…", she stammered. "—no, no, this is too embarrassing…", she dismissed it.

"What? You can tell me...", he asked, curious.

His eyes looked genuine to her. She thought to herself if maybe, just maybe, things were going to be fine this time. After all, taking the risk wouldn't hurt. She looked nervous, and started pacing around the room in circles. She waved her arms up, like complaining.

"Geez! This is _too_ much! My folks kicked me out of home! I don't have a place to go!", she explained. She stoped pacing for a second and rubbed her neck, feeling uneasy. "But I just- I wanted to use your phone, not your help, because I'm actually moving to Virginia on two weeks straight for college!", she blurted out, tired of crying and embarrassing herself. "There, I said it. Stupid football head, always helping people….", she muttered under her breath.

He stood there, his mouth open. "Oh… that's… so hard to swallow…", he finally spoke, with a sad face. He walked over to Helga and gave her a hug, which she accepted. She smelled his hair, and a lovestruck look formed in her face. A minute or so later, he pulled the hug apart to find her eyes, blushing furiously. "Uhm, feeling better already?".

Helga gulped, embarrassed, blushing. "Yeah…. kinda…".

A grin formed in his face. "I'll tell you what… you can use a room here, and stay whenever you want. Then you go to Virginia as I have to go to rehab. You can be my… guest of honor! Just like you said the other day! How's that sound?", he offered.

Helga smiled happily. "That's… that's great, football head!", she said, as she nodded. But suddenly, she stopped, and her smile faded. She glared at him. "Wait a minute!".

"What?", he asked, confused.

She scanned the whole house with a look. "It's too darn quiet in here! Where the hell are the boarders?!".

Arnold blinked for a second. "Oh! That!", he pointed out, remembering. He sighed. "Well, after my grandpa was history, the boarders started getting uncomfortable around me. They asked me if everything was alright every single effing day, and even they gave me pitiful looks at dinner time. Oskar Kokoshka started getting weird, and paranoid, thinking I was hating him for being a bum, so he started asking me when I could get rid of him. And Mr. Hyunn and Ernie started making bets. But at the same time, Oskar was trying to help in the kitchen. It turned out so bad, he even burned the kitchen table by just putting milk and cereal in a bowl!", he explained.

Helga raised an eyebrown, surprised at the last part. "You can't burn a house with milk and cereal!", she chuckled slightly.

Arnold shook his head in understanding. "But that's Oskar we're talking about", he laughed. She did, too. "Eventually, after that incident, Oskar somehow started convincing everyone I was just THE bad guy and that they had to protest and just take the house for themselves. Because of the damage caused, I finally snapped and broke my contract with Mrs. Kokoshka and kicked her and Oskar goodbye. And as for the rest of the boarders, I had to kick them out too as well because of the bum's influence. I broke their contracts also, and called the police because they've been protesting around my house a whole week, but finally, as they realized I wouldn't budge, and because of Oskar's poor management of the situation, they agreed to separate and left to look at other places to live. I've never heard of them anymore, and honestly, I couldn't care less. The idea of having such ungrateful boarders, still freaks me out at nights", he explained more as he shook his head, and sighed heavily.

She was surprised Kokoshka had such potential, even when he was a bum. She raised an eyebrown, questioningly. "That Oskar was always a weirdo. I've never understood why Phil never kicked him out of the place", she asked.

"Well, her wife was hardworking and was paying the rent on time", Arnold explained.

"I still don't get one thing. If they're no boarders in here, how come the house has electricity and phone?", she asked, suddenly.

Arnold shook his head yes. "That's because of my grandparent's will and testament. I'm owning the house officially in 3 years. Meanwhile my lawyer and my accountant are taking care of all the papers".

She raised an eyebrown, putting her arms in jars. "So? That doesn't answer my question, buck-o!".

"Life insurance over both of them gives me the right to get five thousand dollars of income per month for 2 years, and I still can preserve my college fund", he explained.

She smiled now. "Oh, that's awesome, football head!".

"Yeah…", he sighed heavily as lowered down his head a bit. "But I'm gonna miss them so much…". He sniffed.

Helga's heart broke, and her smile faded. She touched her chest, as her sad eyes grew wide and her lips quivered, feeling the exact same thing as her beloved. She approached Arnold and gave him a hug, which felt appropriate and rightful to do. She knew all about his grandparents. She practically wished there were people like them in her own house, who would care, would be nice and even had useful wisdom and answers. And a crazy old lady like his grandma Gertie, of course! Tears rolled her eyes as she pressed Arnold to her chest, remembering the few moments she had with them, and the dark secrets they kept for her. They knew about her and Arnold all this time, but within the years, they thought he would have to figure it out by himself what was on her mind. And that was simply the reason they had earned her full respect. But when she saw the coffin with Gertie first, then Phil in it, each of it was a blow to the face.

"I know the feeling. I'm gonna miss them too, football head", she said, raspy voice coming out of her lips.

* * *

R&R people! More coming soon! Cheers!


	10. Chapter 10: Helga opens the door

**X**

**Helga opens the door**

Helga pulled apart the hug a few seconds later to just discover in what position she was. She looked at Arnold, as her cheeks went pink from embarrassment. She never was so fully emotional with him, and she thought maybe he would freak out after seeing her in that state. But there was something in his stare that made her pretty sure he didn't care if she was emotional, or angry, or whatever state she was in. It was a look of interest, curiousness, a need to meet the real Helga! He always stated she wasn't totally screwed up person, and that someday she would show her true feelings.

They were going to kiss. He was inches close to her, and she could feel it. She leaned in closer, puckered her lips and…

A knock at the door woke up the two from their loving trance.

Helga scoffed. "What now?".

Forgetting Arnold completely, her instincts dragged her to the door, fearing it might be Bob or someone unwanted like Olga. She opened the door to find Lila and Sid drunken both, trashed clothes, eyes puffy and red, and balancing each other to each side to remain composure. Helga didn't knew if they were drunk or high. She shrugged at the thought.

Sid slurred a "Hey, _Hell Girllll_, how's goingggg?".

Helga was boiling in rage, not because only the presence of a screwed up Lila Sawyer at the door, but Sid calling her 'Hell Girl' was a ticket to a world of punishment. She tightened her grip on the doorknob practically wishing to smash the door on his stupid large nose and send him off to Pluto.

"What the heck do you two bozos want?!", she asked, not moving an inch to prevent Arnold from seeing both in that state.

Lila spoke first. "We were… uhm,… wondering like it would be… ever so sweeeet if Arnold was there?", she slurred.

Helga scoffed and put her arms over her chest. "Arnold's not here. Now beat it!".

"You ssssure?", Sid stretched past Helga and looked at Arnold. "Heeeey, _Arnollld_! Long time no see...hic..., buddy!", he saluted.

Helga took Sid's left arm and broke it in two before doubling it behind his back, as if she was a security guard. Lila watched in horror, but she couldn't form the words out.

"I told you Arnold's not in here!", Helga snarled.

Lila scoffed. "Welll, that's ever so… hic… meannn coming from you, dear Helga!", she slurred as she put her arms on her hips.

Helga snarled a "Shut it, Princess, 'cause you're next!", as she kept crushing Sid's left arm.

Sid cried. "I just wanted Arnold to be here!".

As Arnold's name came out of Sid's lips, the first came outside. He watched in surprise at the scene, but he didn't intervene.

"What for, buck-o? Speak!", Helga screamed at him.

Tears rolled from Sid's eyes, as his pain increased. "Ow! We just wanted some weed! That's all!".

Helga blinked in surprise. But she recovered. "Well isn't that cute! But let me tell you that Arnold here…", she said pointing at Arnold, "…he's going to rehab! So about you two clowns, I expect you to go the fuck away before I get really-".

"Wait here, Sid!", Arnold cut Helga off.

Helga overheard and watched in surprise as Arnold motioned inside to his house, and a few minutes later came with a handful of bags of pot in his hands, throwing them at Sid. Helga released Sid as she watched the bags in horror.

Sid smiled miserably, with only a few teeth left, as he retrieved with Lila all the bags. "Thanksh Arnoldd!".

Arnold put his arms over his chest, and threw a look at Lila and Sid. "I gave you what you wanted, but don't ever come to my house again asking for this. As Helga put it, I'm going to rehab. Those are the last!", he stated.

Lila decided to seduce Arnold in front of a horrified Helga by giving him a full mouth to mouth kiss. That's when Helga exploded. She grabbed Sid by the collar and threw his fragil body to the streets. As for Lila, she grabbed her and started beating the shit out of her. Lila responded with a kick to Helga's face, but Helga covered. Lila again tried by slapping Helga, and it did work. Covered in rage, Helga responded by grabbing Lila by her freckles and smashing her head with her own, causing Lila to step back and faint to the floor. Lastly, she kicked Lila's butt to let her fall to the streets on top of Sid. Then, she threw the bags of weed to the nearby trash can.

"Criminy, why do I always have trouble with this stuff?!", she said as she threw the remnants of pot.

Arnold watched in awe and shock, not believing his eyes. But he gasped, more shocked, as Helga came strolling to him in an apparently bad mood. He covered his body in case she would pound him, too. Nothing happened. Instead, he found her scanning him, and giving him a glare.

"Let's get one thing straight,_ buck-o_!", she said, as she pointed a finger at his chest. "If you want to get along with me at your home, you'll have to tell me everything you do, including taking a shit! I'm proud of you that you'll take the rehab after all, but I don't want any more surprises! You hear?", she stated.

Arnold smiled, and pulled a goofy salute. "Yes, madam fortress mummy!".

She laughed at his reply. It maybe wasn't so genuine, but she loved the determination he always had. "Let's go inside before those two clowns wake up!", she said as she grabbed his hand, threw him insidee and slammed the front door shut.

Arnold's eyes widened in shock as Helga suddenly took his face and instantly kissed him. He could notice. There was a huge difference between Lila's and hers. While Helga's kiss was soft and kind, and Lila was rude to just show some jealousy. He wasn't stupid. Helga wanted to do it right now, so, he pulled away, softly, as he scanned the house and found that Oskar's old room would be enough to have a beautiful afternoon together.

He now grabbed her wrist and pulled her to the room that was last on the corner. Helga's curiousness and smile grew as he reached Kokoshka's bedroom and opened the door to find the room as it was, emptied of all furniture, except for a two stories bed, a small TV and a couch. A lamp lied broken on the floor, and some plates. He knew Oskar and Suzie would have a last fight before leaving.

"Well, what do you think?", he asked her with a huge grin.

Helga raised an eyebrown. "What do I think of what?".

"It'll be your room from now on, Helga", Arnold stated.

She gasped. "You mean…?".

He nodded. She grabbed him by the collar and pulled him into a deep, passionate kiss, as she pulled her shirt out, revealing a pink bra, and finally closed the door behind her.

* * *

Sorry. No internet, no publications... -.-

Read & Rewiev, people! More coming soon!


	11. Chapter 11: Issues

**XI**

**Issues**

Arnold relaxed, comfortably, naked in bed, under the covers, putting an arm around Helga's shoulders and smiled. "That was fun!".

Helga felt his arm around her, and cuddled. "Damn, football head! You sure know how to please women…", she said, as she smiled and closed her eyes.

He looked at her angel beside him, and closed his eyes, confidently enough. "That's because I slept with a few before." He realized he was talking to Helga. "Not that I care, really".

Helga's eyes shot open. "Oh, you mean…?".

He nodded, a little embarrased. "Yep. Lila, and _Rhonda_".

She almost fell from bed. "RHONDA?! As in Rhonda Wellington Lloyd?".

He nodded, again. More confident, he sighed. "It sorta happened a few weeks ago. She thought that I had money. She already knew my grandpa was sick and that I would be the new heir, since my parents were declared dead for being almost 20 years missing. And I was depressed, and lonely, so, each one expressed our mutual feelings of having some needs to be covered", he explained.

She was curious, of course. She raised an eyebrown. "And, may I ask, what happened to Princess?".

Arnold chuckled at the nickname. "The obvious. Being in a relationship that was only for heritage and sex, wouldn't work. There wasn't any mutual love. Although her body was delicious indeed, she was a pain in the ass. Obnoxious, racist, jealous of everything, she wanted to go shopping all the fucking time. Her own mind was cuckoo! That maybe is the reason she found a better partner with Curly. So she broke up with me and two days later, she started dating him. They're still going on", as he explained more, he looked at Helga's face to see her reaction.

Helga blinked a few times, and glared. "And that's why I never EVER could have been friends with her. I could be a badass alright, but I'm not the racist type. Although I'm jealous, who wouldn't be?".

Arnold glanced at her. "I get it you're the jealous type. You kicked Lila's butt today!", he chuckled slightly.

Her cheeks went red. "Well, as a matter of fact, Arnold, she was in no position to take what's mine, and mine only", she said, as she playfully poked him on the chest.

He kissed her forehead. "Let's get some sleep, alright?".

"Well… I don't know about you, but I was thinking of taking a shower", she playfully poked him on the cheeks.

Arnold wiggled his eyebrowns. "A shower? As in, together?", he asked.

She shrugged, and smiled. Arnold nodded, and stood up, naked as he was. He disappeared through the door, as he brought up some towels. Helga laughed in her mind at the thought of someone seeing him from outside, but her thoughts were broken when he threw her a towel that landed on her face. He laughed as she glared at him.

"The last one is a rotten egg!", he smiled as he childisly started walking to the only bathroom of the house, giving her advantage to run after him.

"Oh, no, you don't!", she yelled, as she ran behind him.

Arnold opened the shower and Helga stepped in the bathtub. She teased him as she kneeled to grab the soap, as she showed her butt at him, as she smiled. Surprised at first, he smiled as he stepped in the bathtub with her, grabbing her from behind, and teasing her with his own manhood. The shower ran freely through both bodies. They both moaned, but she moaned loudly as he kissed her neck and started moving inside of her inch by inch. They kissed, and moaned of pleasure. He couldn't take it anymore and spluttered his fluids inside her.

After a nice shower, they began dressing, slowly, tiredly, sweating. Looking at each other with lust glares, bringing their desires up, it was painful enough for them to resist not doing another Helga and Arnold magic moment. But the time to sleep came, and they crawled to bed before Arnold turned off the lights and Helga snugged to his hairy chest before both fell asleep.

A few minutes later, a dream was cast upon Helga's own head.

* * *

_It was Sunset Arms, alright, only a bit abandoned. Front door and windows partially covered in wood tablons, bottles of beer scattered all over the pavement, a cat howling scared in horror. Her body suddenly came across the door without even her knowing. Sitting his butt on the couch, was a fat Arnold, drinking his beer, his belly button showing between his sweating shirt, and blue shorts, while watching TV, smoking cigarettes, the classic old bum. A second, but pregnant Helga came through the kitchen with a light cigarette on her mouth, with a cookie on a plate, as she sat in the corner of the couch and crossed her legs. She looked terrible, and skinny. She had a pink dress alright, the same pink bow on her head. She let her pig tails again and her unibrown grow, as she had bags under her eyes. She smiled a practical toothless face to him, as she planted a mushy kiss on his forehead and watched TV with him. Suddenly, the lights cut off, leaving them both surprised._

* * *

Helga woke up, squealing and sweating from her weird dream as she sat on the bed, panting. She looked at Arnold, snoring and smiling, but the feeling she would be a stupid idiot with him caught her terribly upset with herself. She would resolve those questions tomorrow, as she decided not to wake him up. She loved him so much to just let a stupid scary dream get her. She let her thoughts go away, as she closed her eyes and fell asleep.

The dream continued where it left off.

* * *

_The eyes of Arnold in the obscurity closed as he let out a groan._ "Oh, no! I forgot today was the last day of payment!".

_Helga let out a soft whisper, as her eyes semi-closed in the darkness, letting a_ "Don't ya worry, honeyy! We still got your college funds to get the electrician move on his butt!", _she slurred._

_The eyes of Arnold fluttered open._ "Gee, that's right, Hell girl! That's why I love you sho much!".

"And we still got Stinky's assistance. He said he someday will contact some other people as boarders. Well, not that I care, but that was 2 years ago, right?".

_They laughed and found their lips, as they kissed._

"Mommy! Daddy! There's no power on my Wii-Chu!",_ a kid asked._

_Helga groaned, while she turned on a candle._ "I know, Albert-o! Go play with your sister outside! We will take care of matters!".

_Albert grabbed what it seemed like a bat with nails sticking out._ "Oh, sis!".

* * *

The dream ended abruptly and Helga let out a scream of horror. She pushed Arnold out of bed, and that's when Arnold woke up.

He placed his chin on the bed, as he rubbed his head. "Ow! Helga! What the-You ok?", he asked, as he turned on the lights. He found her staring at him with a glare. "What?", he asked, staring back at her.

"Get-the-_fuck_-out".

Arnold blinked a few times, before scratching his head. "Oh, that's a good one. Why should I? This is my house".

"I mean out of the room, buck-o!", she screamed at him.

He gasped at her sudden change of behavior. "You seem tense!".

Helga scoffed. "You would be if you would spend the rest of your days living as a copy of Oskar's wife!".

Now he glared at her. "What's that supposed to mean?".

"GRR-**GET YOUR STUPID FOOTBALL HEADED ASS OUT OF HERE!**", she snarled, demanding with a balled fist.

"Ok, ok, but we will discuss this tomorrow! Geez, woman!", Arnold quickly grabbed his clothes and ran to the door, closing it with a sonorous slam.

Helga fell of in her bed as she grabbed her face with her hands and screamed in frustration.


	12. Chapter 12: What happens

**XII**

**What happens if you don't listen**

Although there was tension built up in the house, and they were the only ones at home, Arnold resolved to talk to Helga the next morning, as he opened the covers of his own bed and drifted off to sleep. A dream came to his head, making him roll over the sides and mumble things.

_Helga was walking down the aisle of what seemed to be a nicely built Jupah at the center of a beautiful garden, although he didn't think of Helga becoming the marrying religious type. Another Arnold, just like him, drunk, red eyed, bowtie loose, bottle of whisky in hand was poorly dressed in time as a best man, which made himself freak out and ponder who was the fiancée. The Rabi accepted their consolidation in matrimony by writing the papers, and when Arnold touched the shoulder of the fiancée to turn him around, he was shocked to learn it was none other than brainy Brainy, who in return gave him a creepy, under-the-flashlight smile._

Arnold woke up sweating and somehow exhausted. He glanced at his clock and read 1.30 AM. It couldn't be. Helga would never leave him forever, would she? He chuckled as he thought it was just a bad dream.

* * *

At 9 in the morning, Helga stirred as she felt sudden pounds at her new bedroom door.

"I'm coming! I'm coming, geez!", she screamed, as she started putting on her pants, and socks, and her bra.

She stepped off the bed, and walked to the door. She opened and glared at who was the one who interrupted her sleep. Her death look at Arnold only softened seconds later when he, himself, brought her breakfast on a tray.

"Why?".

Arnold looked confused at her, as he gave her the tray in her hands. "It's a service for guests", he explained. "Well, at least since grandpa died, I decided to bring breakfast to the boarders. As I explained to them, I wanted this to be more like an hotel, with housekeepers and such. They didn't like it, of course. There was a big difference between renting a room for a month and renting said room for a day, and that was partially the reason they mutinied against me. They even thought I was going to raise the rent. So…".

She put the tray in her bed and sighed. "Arnold. You have a good heart, really good heart, But you make _soo much_ stupid decisions!".

He stared at her, questioningly. "I'm sorry, but I'm not getting it. _You_ decided I was going to sleep outside your new room, even when we had the most amazing-".

She cut him off, raising her arms up in protest. "It's not that, Arnold-o! It's about yourself and your life!".

He put his arms over his chest. "What about my life?".

"You think I'm blind enough that I didn't even notice you've never suffered from abstinence after all this time? You think I don't know that junkies conserve some of their weed while going to rehab?", she retorted.

"No, I just try to cope by smoking cigarettes until I start next monday", he stated, matter-of-factly.

She raised an eyebrown. "Oh, really? Then why did I just dream last night we were married, had two kids, **BUT** you were a bum, I was an alcoholic, and a smoker, AND I was pregnant, and we were using your college money to survive?".

His jaw fell in shock, and his eyes widened. He was lost for words. "Uhh..".

"You do get why I was last night pissed off now…", she lowered down her head, and sighed heavily.

"I had a dream of my own", he said. She raised her head up and looked at him. "You just married Brainy".

Now it was her turn to be surprised. Well, mostly. "W-well yeah, buck-o! I'll marry who I want! I'm Helga Marrying Pataki! But now to the point!", she put a finger to his chest, not playfully, but hard. "You want us to stay here, rotting and living like failures or you want us to succeed? It's up to you, Arnold-o!". As she said that, she went to the bed and grabbed a toasted cheese sandwich, which she had to admit, was delicious.

She was right. Arnold raised a finger up the air to re-establish his decision. "I..uh…".

There was a doorbell ring.

Arnold and Helga looked at each other, and he went to open the door. A lawyer stepped inside without warning.

"Arnold… Sherm—Shortman?", the lawyer asked.

"Yes?", he replied.

"The name's Phil Hartman, Mr. Shortman. I'm on behalf of Miss Rhonda Wellington Lloyd, regarding a succession. She's suing you for rape and stalking, and because she claims she's a long lost niece to the family of your grandmother. All of your bank accounts are clean and untouched because it's a college fund but your life insurance have been blocked.", he explained, as Arnold widened his eyes more and more in shock at each word. "You have been served. Have a good day", he said as he handed him a yellow paper. The lawyer gave a curt nod to him and Helga, who was watching the whole scene, and then he left.

Arnold stared at the guy step into his BMW and speed away. Then, he stared at Helga, desperatedly, like, finding hope from her.

"Don't look at me, football head! Call your own lawyer this instant!", she immediately replied to his stare.

"Right!", he went to the phone, only to find the line was dead.

Also the lights suddenly went off. "Strange… we're in May 26th… the phone bill and the electricity should've been paid off!".

He went upstairs to his room and searched for his cellphone. He returned while talking to his cellphone to his lawyer. "….no, no, I don't know why she sued! We ended a two week relationship. She's rich, she's not married to anyone of my family and her last name is Lloyd….", he said as he waited for a response. His eyes widened, as he glared to the wall. "What do you mean she's adopted?! Her parents are her biological… oh… I see… but, I'm a blond, and she's brunette! Alright I'll call you later".

He clicked on his cellphone and used it to ask his accountant.

"Hi, this is Arnold Shortman. I'm calling because my bank accounts have been searched and my life insurance has been blocked. Contact me when you can".

Helga looked at the whole scene in silence. His lawyer called again, apologizing and told him his life insurance would be opened again once the court settled an arrangement. Also, because of the fees he was charging on him, he wouldn't have any insurance payment for at least 6 months. He cursed under his breath, and hung up his lawyer, then looked at Helga.

"I'm sorry… I'm just… I don't know what to do…", he sighed heavily, as he sat on the staircase, miserably.

Helga approached him and slapped his face. "What do you mean you don't know?! I know! You can move your ass and start searching for new boarders! And I MYSELF...", she pointed at her chest with confidence, "...can be a co-manager".

His eyes opened wide as he smiled of joy. "Helga! That's a terrific idea! I'll start looking right now!".

She smiled openly at him. But soon, it faded when she remembered something. "Oh… just… one recommendation... Don't even suggest talking to Stinky".

Arnold's jaw dropped. How did she knew? "What? Why not?".

"He will search for new people when pigs fly", she stated, matter-of-factly.

"Is that on your dream, too?", he asked, surprised.

"Yep!", she replied.

"Damn… we have to get some money now…", he said, as he bit his nails, nervously.

Helga slapped her forehead. "This is going to be a looong day...".


	13. Chapter 13: Phantom of the operation

**XIII**

**Phantom of the operation**

She was polishing her nails, sitting in an antique but restored white divan while two of her servants prepared a considerable amount of food in a dinner glass table next to her side. Fruits, vegetables, chicken, rice, Yahoo soda cans, gouda cheese cut in separated pieces, and pork. She looked at her fashion red bright dress that reached her ankles with a smile, and checked her combining red shoes. She also checked her white bra which had her picture of Curly Glammerthorpe at the center, resembling her beloved in her heart. 19-year-old Rhonda Wellington Lloyd chuckled at the thought of him, he was a midget when she first laid her eyes on him. His nerd glasses, his mouth full of dirty compliments at her, his messy hair, and his stupid riots at school because of him not getting what he wanted. She remembered him plotting against Principal Wartz because he got one month detention, breaking havoc at the cafeteria after he received soup on an orange plate and he wanted a blue one because he wouldn't recognize what he was eating, so he threw the plate at the kitchen lady, burning her. But the most scandal ever admitted, and what gave Rhonda his attention was because of her sudden compromise with Arnold. This would break him.

Curly would take out his heart, and would give her poetry outside her luxury mansion every night, dressed Shakesperean-like, and she would release the dogs, not caring if one of them would dismember him. That, until she would realize he was for her, and her only. Or maybe, because he would serve as the nutcase in any situation and would protect her.

But the sudden change in his appearance was what most hit her. He would grow up to match her size, his muscles also from going repeatedly to the gym ever since he knew about her and Arnold, and his acne would disappear. His break up with Lila was also another thing that made her realize she was jealous. Or maybe the sudden horror of knowing Lila was on drugs and alcohol and would not distinguish Curly from Sid.

True, Arnold was a great lover, a great companionship, the best boyfriend she ever had. But that wasn't enough. He felt she didn't represent a big deal for him, and she felt dishonored, and disrespected. Her last conversation with him was that he wanted someone less confrontational and a little less naïve. And a little more poor. Like she was going to be someone more like that! Her polished nail broke from the sudden anger she felt about Arnold. "Aww damn it!", she cried as she saw her nail.

A butler appeared suddenly and made a reverence. "Master Glammerthorpe is coming this way, Ma'am", he said, as he bowed down.

"Send him in!", she said, nervous as she was trying to replace her nail with a prosthetic one.

She glanced up to watch Curly in an angry state, each footstep he did was giving the floor an earthquake. What was wrong with him?

"I find your denounces against the football headed guy unacceptable!", he said, raising his index finger in the air.

Rhonda was taken aback by this sudden statement. But she quickly recover, giving him a smile. "And why is that, my _dear_ Thadeus?".

Curly returned her gaze with a glare. "It is because that means you show him interest, while I have to watch and suffer through all the legal battle! You will eventually drop in his arms, and marry and have kids!".

Rhonda gasped as her heart skipped a beat, while she listened in silence. He was so dumb thinking she would get herself in someone else's arms just like that, but his confirmation about his jealousy was cute... for her state of mind.

"I would be the laughing douchebag of all my friends and associates!", he said, as he dropped to his knees in weird motion. "The chaos, the ruins, the headaches!", he pleaded to the wall. He turned normal this time, got up to his feet, snorted, and gave her a piece of his mind. "Besides, you have all the attention you need, all this-", he said as he extended his arms and looked about, "-**PALACE**, this huge house, owned actually by your adoptive parents, and you have ME! And you don't actually need some crummy old house, nor money. You just have to live your eternal life of beauty without any worries and that's it!".

She shot him a look of understanding, but as she spoke, her voice was full of venom and despise. "You don't think I did not know that? That I'm dumb? Listen to yourself, Thadeus, thinking I was going to care about some stupid old house that once belonged to some old creeps! No. It IS about Arnold alright, but this Arnold I knew was always the voice of reason, the competition for my goals, he had always had his house to invite anyone who he wanted and he always gave me the lecture of how racist I became and how crude I was, and that I needed to change my habits! I won't deny his grandparents died, that he's an orphan, now that his life is going down the toilet, yeah, I would forget about that. But he messed up with my style of life! And I want compensation for that insulting piece of shit!".

Curly shook his head, and sighed. "Rhonda, Rhonda, Rhonda… You're more intelligent than getting mad over a simple remark! Besides, you just dated the guy for two weeks!".

Rhonda pulled his collar, and he was nose to nose with her. "Two weeks and I took a glance and THAT house is ours! For us. We will not have to depend on my mom and dad to buy us anything!".

Curly gulped. "But-but, it's hideous planning!".

She shrugged. "And I could make some reforms!".

"But, what about the neighborhood? Shouldn't they be pissed off?", he asked.

"I took care of the neighborhood. I gave the courage to Oskar Kokoshka to turn the boarding house against Arnold. And he didn't even knew about it!", she stated.

"I…", he sighed. "Rhonda, you're going too far.". He approached and sat below her, and took her hands in his. He caressed her hair, which she accepted. "Forget about the whole thing. Don't get pissed off because someone told you to be different. Think about me, think about how I don't give a damn!".

"Well, then you shouldn't give a damn either about the whole Arnold business, 'cause it's none of yours, really!", she replied, taking a handful of grapes.

Curly grabbed the grapes, and saying a "Let me!", as he offered himself to put them in her mouth.

"Besides, thanks to this, I'm getting US a house!", she said, again, proudly.

As he dropped another grape in her mouth, he thought he should still reconsider. "But you're taking him out on the streets!".

"He deserves that! Besides, what good would the world have with an annoying football headed brat going around the streets giving advice to others and being a stupid goody-two-shoes? Who fucking cares? I don't!".

"Exactly my point! You're being too obsessive".

"Do you have any other ideas, my love?".

"Buy the house", he stated, matter-of-factly.

Rhonda blinked for a few seconds. Then she burst out laughing, uncontrollably. "That's hilarious! You're so funny! Why would I spend my allowance in… something… SO OLD?! AHAHA!", she was crying of laughter and gasping for air.

"Do what you want, but I'm going to inform Arnold that I'm not part of this!", he said.

She stopped laughing, as she recovered on the spot, and dried her tears. "You wouldn't dare!", she snarled.

"I would, certainly", he nodded curtly.

Rhonda was taken aback again. She thought he was going serious, but a man like him without the woman of his dreams would certainly shred into millions of pieces. She played in her most convincing and sexy voice. "Well, you aren't serious, are you? You know you wouldn't resist not having ME, and my body at your full service!", she cackled, as she ran a hand down her waist.

The thought of need ran through Curly's brain as he watched Rhonda being a beautiful hotty, playing the devil herself, but still, hot. He shook his head no, as his tongue stuck out and in from his mouth like a dog. Smoke ran from his ears, and his head boiled. He grabbed her with his strong grip and started kissing her neck, then bited playfully her ear, which gave her tickles. He could hear her moan when he started caressing a boob. He couldn't take it anymore, so his lips were on hers, in full passion, as his hands ran through all her body. He was touching her perfect curves, and ruffling her hair, while she enjoyed it.

Rhonda, with gasps of moan and lack of air from the heat, glanced at Curly and smiled playfully. "So, are you still mad at me for what I have done?", she said, as she pouted, innocently.

He stopped kissing her for a second and raised an eyebrown. A few seconds of silence passed. "Oh, what the heck, you're delicious, Rhonda my dear!", he replied, as he continued where he left off.


	14. Chapter 14: Doing the man's job

**XIV**

**Doing the man's job**

As the sunlight was slowly starting to appear at the house, she quickly ran to Arnold's grandparents room and searched for their clothes. She found and took one of Phil's blue suit, and tried it on. She suddenly looked so weird in a man's suit, but she needed it in order to start looking for new people. As she recalled, this operation was business, and business always required a suit. A thing she learned from her own father, Big Bob. As she added a bowtie to the seemingly white but almost yellow shirt from the dirt, she looked at herself in the mirror. Helga looked up and down and smiled, thinking she only needed a few arrangements to the pants, but felt relieved Phil's size was almost the same as hers. It would have looked horrible if she had to search for new boarders at 9-years-old, but at 18, suits looked good, and sexy. She wondered through Gertie's old shoes, and found out a pair of blue ones to combine. She was glad Phil preserved her wife's wardrobe, or she would be forced to use one of his large shoes.

Arnold was waiting, sitting on the large table in the living room. He watched as Helga came out with his grandpa's suit on and smiled, when she looked at her face covered in makeup and her pigtails again sticking out. "Wow, Helga, you look hot!", he said, as his smile widened.

She glared back at him. "Don't you dare laugh at me, football head! Remember I'm doing this for you because I care!".

He looked serious this time. "Yeah, I get it, you're the man boss now", he nodded, trying not to roll on the floor and guffaw with all his might.

She snarled. Knowing him was going to be a part of her life, and dealing with him was going to be a huge problem for her. But as long as they loved each other, she didn't care. She sighed in defeat. She was not mad at him. Right at the moment, she wanted nothing more than rip Princess's head off and give Curly's dead body to the wolves, rather than doing… this.

She shook her head and sat beside him on the table, with a notepad and a pen. "Alright, Arnoldo, listen up! Before we have to search for new boarders, I suggest you give me some data of your former boarders. How did they live, how did they pay your grandpa, and who exactly they were. I have to make a profile of who your new boarders will be. Also, I suggest you put an advice on the papers tomorrow and stick a note on the door outside".

Arnold nodded at each of Helga's words. He smiled when she finished. "Okay, let's start with the Kokoshka's then. Oskar was never the type of working guy. He said the military left him mentally disturbed, which might be not true, because his stories always involved ice-cream truck fights, and lawsuits everywhere. He was always hungry, and the rest of the boarders laughed at him". As he told her that, he saw her writing on the notepad 'LOSER. EXTREMELY SISSY. WEIRD-O'. He shook his head and continued. "Mrs. Kokoshka, on the other hand, was a good and hardworking person. Not only she had to work, but she also had to make Oskar's laundry, make him a sandwich, and deal with his laziness. And when on the table, she was always trying to find words that he was a good guy". She wrote 'SLAVE. BEATEN WIFE' on her notebook. "She always paid the rent, not him, even if he was delivering newspapers, he always kept the money for himself". She wrote down 'MANIPULATED'.

He continued. "Ernie Potts was obsessed with his job on demolition. So much he was talking about it always at the table. He had a collection of dynamite boxes in his room…", as he said that, Helga looked up at him from her notebook, wondering why the house never exploded. But she shrugged it off. Then she wrote 'DANGEROUS MORON'. "…and he had always a discussion with Mr. Hyunn that endured hours and was always bossy over Oskar, who demanded him to be a man and go to work. He also had a wife and a daughter, but divorced. He always paid in checks".

She wrote 'POSSIBLY GAY. JEALOUS TYPE. BETS ON HORSES'. Arnold raised an eyebrown, but continued.

"Mr. Hyunn was an Asiatic with a high pitched voice, and a weird love for poetry and junk food". She wrote down 'GAY' three times. "He worked at a laundry shop and was always telling us how to care for the machines we had in the basement, and how to combine our clothes to wash". She wrote down 'LOSER'. "He once dressed as a damsel to help me with the play of 'Romeo and Juliet' in 4th grade.". He regretted this last comment, as she raised her head and an eyebrown at him. Then she wrote down an overextended 'FAG'. "Oh, he always paid on cash but always wanted a discount on the rent". She wrote 'POSSIBLE MAFIA DEALER'.

She spoke up. "Okay, it seems your grandparents were not noticing the guys living at your house were none other than crazy lunatics! It never occurred to your poor folks on their head that they were always dangerous, and you should have never had to grow up with such extreme losers".

"I know what you wrote down, Helga, but I don't think they're so-".

She cut him off. "Football head, you think you know them so well, but once they start mutiny on your own house, anything could have happened. They could've killed you off and take the boarding house for themselves, claiming the benefits, and saying it was an accident. They didn't do it of course, because they've respected you and your grandpa all this time as they had a home or they weren't clever enough and were so stupid not to do it! But if they were so much than ungrateful bastards…".

Arnold was surprised at Helga's words. She was right, always was.

She looked down her notebook and back at him again, pointing out the details. "The reason I had to get some information was because I wanted to look out for better boarders, people who could pay and rent a room without any issues with themselves in their heads. I'm sure there are a lot of wanna-be actors out there, or students looking for a study place, or recently married couples. I don't know, help me here, hair boy".

He curtly nodded, and started thinking. "Mmmmh… Well, there's always Dino Spumoni, for example. He lost his singing voice because of a bad operation, but he was well at the piano and the guitar".

"Yeah, well, we could call him or make him a visit but only if he doesn't practice his instruments here, only when needed. It would be annoying to have to deal with neighbours at 3 am in the morning 'cause he wouldn't shut up", she wrote down 'ASK DINO SPUMONI'.

"Mr. Green's wife passed away last year and his home makes him remember her everywhere", he suggested.

She raised an eyebrown. "He had a wife?".

"Yeah, why?", he asked.

"I always thought pink boy Harold would be his heir and-".

"He married a couple of years ago to a 70-year-old woman. He finally got out of his meat shop, leaving the co-managing to Harold. His job was his life, so, he didn't have any time to fill his heart. But what he didn't know was that she was sick and dying of a battle with lung cancer because of the smoke", he explained.

She wrote down 'ASK MR. GREEN'. She sighed. She didn't want to hear Harold Berman's voice mocking at her suit. "Those are two, one remains".

"Well, you of course, and we're three", he said.

"I know, Arnoldo! But I don't pay and we could use your room for rent", she said.

That took Arnold off guard. He raised from his seat, slightly scandalized. "My room? W-why? Why?! And where would I live?".

She smiled. "I knew you would get pissed off. First things first. If I will be co-manager of this building, I should be living with you. But Oskar's place is more adequate to start a more serious business, and your room looks like a playground for children, which it's not serious. We could put Dino Spumoni with his instruments there, and no one would notice the difference between you making a fuss and him making it. Besides, I may have to turn down my college education for a year to help you settled with this, and live with your addiction, so shut up and kiss my ass!", she said as she banged a fist to the table.

He looked wild eyed at her, as he approached her and took her in his arms and caressed her hair. He kissed her, slightly on the lips. "You… I mean, you would do that… for me?".

She became dizzy from his sudden act of love, but shook her head. "Doi! I love you, football head, of course I would do whatever floats your boat. Criminy, I don't want to be all fuzzy again! Yeesh!", she shrieked as if a sudden cold wind spread across her body.

As he kissed again, she melted. A sudden knock on the front door stopped them. They glanced at each other, then Arnold answered. She heard a gasp coming from him.

"Gerald?!".


	15. Chapter 15: Doing the man's job Part II

**XV**

**Doing the man's job Part II**

It didn't look good. It didn't look good at all. From what Helga could see, Gerald was aiming a gun at Arnold's head. Arnold was standing still with his hands raised above his head and Gerald's hands were shaking uncontrollably. She watched in horror at the scene and her legs were trembling of fear.

"Gerald, what the fuck are you doing?!", she could hear Arnold shouting at his now ex-friend.

A tear escaped from Gerald's right eye, his hands and whole body shaking in fear, but determined to keep his grip on the gun. "I'm sorry man! I have to do this! They told me to do this or else…".

Arnold was taken by surprise. "**WHO** the hell told you to do this?".

Gerald scoffed. "Damn it! You don't get it, do you, Arnold?! The same guy who sold me the shit we were smoking all this time! My buyer! This bitch over there-", he pointed a finger at Helga, "-threw the contents to the trash, so I couldn't sell it and I lost their money. They were totally pissed off because I had their money and a girl made me screw it up!".

Helga tightened her fists and her teeth were crushing against each other.

"She was only trying to protect both of us, you dumbass!", Arnold told Gerald.

"Either way, I have some money to recover. So, give me a thousand dollars or I'll blow someone's head off with this thing!", Gerald threatened, now pointing the gun at Arnold's temple.

"No, you give me your gun, and you kindly walk out of here before I call the police!", Helga shouted, approaching to Gerald and Arnold, calm and slowly, in the suit.

Gerald blinked for a few seconds, before pointing the gun at her. "I don't think so…".

There was a shot coming from the gun, a bullet making its trajectory at Helga, Arnold, in slow motion trying uselessly to stop all of it, instead throwing himself at Gerald and knocking him down to the floor. There was a fight over them, Arnold trying to get the gun off from Gerald's hands, until a scream of pain were heard. They both shot their heads to watch in mild horror at Helga clutching and taking a bleeding leg with her arms, pressing the wound. A sudden fit of rage overtook Arnold as he looked at Gerald through gritted teeth.

Before Gerald could make a word to say anything, Arnold took the gun from his hands, and started punching his face with all the strength he had. Gerald received blow after blow until he fell into unconsciousness. "A deal is a deal, I suppose…", Arnold said as he grabbed Gerald through the collar of his shirt and dropped him. He rushed over to Helga to see the damage. "Are you OK?". But she pushed him, instead.

"Call the ambulance, NOW!", she bellowed, like she was going into labor.

Instead, he called the police and asked for the ambulance. She shot him a glare, before collapsing and fainting. "HELGA!", he shouted as he rushed to her side again.

The police came running through the opened door, followed by an ambulance. A policeman took Arnold's information while a doctor attended Helga's wound. Another policeman arrested Gerald on the spot.

"Please, don't!", Arnold begged.

"Sir, this man shot your girlfriend, and threatened both your lives, are you implying I should let him go?", the policeman asked.

Arnold shook his head. "I know. But he was forced to do it".

"Arnold, right?", came the other policeman. "Look, son, we can ask him questions about it, but there's nothing else than that for now. We have to take him into custody. We can deal with the real culprit later".

"I just…", Arnold cried. "I just wanted him to go into rehab. I-I was just going to talk to him about it! I didn't know he was going to come here holding a gun!". Tears fell from his eyes.

"Son, I know you're in shock but you should be worried about your girlfriend more. Even I would do it, she's in a man's suit for fuck sakes!".

Arnold shot him a weird look before he looked at Helga dressed in his Grandpa's suit being dropped carefully inside the ambulance.

* * *

He was sitting at a bench in the hospital, outside Helga's room, his hands over his head, letting tears fall free. He was all alone, his now ex-best friend since they were 3 years old was in jail, his girlfriend was injured, and no one was coming because no one knew anything about it. He tried contacting Helga's parents, but without any results. He tried even contacting Phoebe, but Helga's phone was lost during the time the medics were cutting through the suit to clean the wounds, and he couldn't recover the number. Arnold sighed sadly, as he cleaned his tears with a kleenex.

He would have to wait until the doctor would tell him the diagnostics, and he would have to start looking himself for boarders tomorrow, or else, he would lose the house because of lack of payment.

He started thinking about the whole situation. Maybe it was better if he sold the house and move with her to Virginia, and apply for a career himself. He was tired of Hillwood, he was always having to solve problems other people had, and he was tired of the gang whom he was friends with his whole life, as they posed as a threat to his beloved Helga. But would Helga accept selling the house and move? And would he be OK with it? He always pictured having a family of his own, living at the boarding house, and sharing it. But then again, he thought about the possibility. It was certain his Grandpa had bad taste in sharing his house with creeps. And now he had a reputation to rebuild because of Kokoshka. What he never thought was that someone was just winning and expecting him to sell Sunset Arms at any moment.

* * *

**Note: Hey! I know this chapter is a bit short. Sorry, looks like I practically forgot about the story. It's just, I didn't have the inspiration to come up with some new fresh ideas. I was searching for what to put here trying not to screw up and take them out of the damn boarding house some day! **


	16. Chapter 16: Escaping the inevitable

**XVI**

**Escaping the inevitable**

"Are you sure about this?", a certain red headed girl asked through her cellphone, while she was walking inside the hospital. "I mean, I'm ever so certain Arnold won't fall for me anymore. Besides, he's got Helga".

An exasperated sigh came from the other side. "_Just do it! I'll pay you enough and you will have all the men you want at your feet!_".

"How… incredibly… rude! I just want Arnold to like me, and be friends with me!", she answered, angrily as she reached the counter.

"_Fine! Do it and I'll pay you enough to buy a house of your own!_", the offer came through the other side of the phone. "_You know what… I'll pay you and I don't even care what you'll do with the money, okay?_".

Lila just sighed. "Whatever…". She hung up the phone, as she waited in line for the receptionist to give her the room.

Arnold paced back and forth waiting for the doctors to tell him what was wrong with Helga. It made him a nervous wreck to not to know how she was doing. Now the realization came to his mind that Gerald was indeed a dangerous guy, and angrily stated he would not be his friend anymore, despite all the time they spent together. Once he would find the problem with Helga, he would indeed deal with the responsible bastard. But again, he wondered if Gerald was the culprit or if he was a puppet of the circumstances and there was someone else pulling the strings. He didn't have any time to wonder, because someone wrapped her arms around him and tackled him to the ground. He struggled, his eyes were closed, but he was suddenly caught in with emotions thinking that was Helga trying to kiss him. He opened his eyes to discover Lila instead.

He jumped in horror, clinging to the nearest ventilator.

"**Lila!** What the heck are you doing here?", Arnold asked.

"Who? Me? I was oh so sure I was going to just visit a friend of mine. Helga of course", Lila replied, innocently.

He rolled his eyes, and groaned. Of course, they were trying to compete with each other over him, Helga was jealous of Lila and Lila of Helga, and so on. He climbed down before the roof fell along with him.

"You can't visit her, neither do I, because she's at intensive care with a bullet in her leg thanks to my good friend Gerald", Arnold said.

Crocodile tears escaped through Lila's eyes. "That's… that's ever so awful!". She tried to hug him, but he pushed away.

"Yeah, yeah, sure. Look, it's not like I don't want to see you but because of the circumstances-", Arnold started but he was cut off by a scream.

"_OW! Criminy! Fuck! Shit! What the hell is this thing! It hurts!_".

Arnold suddenly shot his head at the door of the room Helga was in, and rushed like a tornado to check up on her. Helga was connected to a serum, her leg was attached to a cast and her temperament was rising because she was in pain.

"Damn it! Now I remember! That stupid, shitty friend of yours!", she said through gritted teeth before Arnold were going to ask her if she was alright.

"I'm glad you're OK", he said, with a sheepish smile.

"Thanks, Football Head. Now go fetch me a doctor 'cause this damn cast is killing me!", she shouted at him.

Arnold rolled his eyes. "Whatever you say, Helga".

"Yeah and please get me some food, 'cause I'm also starving, alright?", she asked, now politely.

"Fine, wait me right here", Arnold said.

Helga blinked for a few seconds. "Like I'm going to go anywhere, buck-o", she said with a sarcastic tone, as she put her arms crossed over her chest.

Arnold didn't reply, but instead closed the door behind him. Luckily a doctor passed by, who also heard all the commotion. While the doctor was checking on Helga's status, Arnold dragged his foot to the cafeteria, followed by Lila.

"So, how's your little girlfriend doing?", she asked.

Arnold sighed heavily. "She's fine, Lila, now please, go. I'm kinda busy".

"But Arnold, I'm ever so certain I wanted to stay with you for a little chit chat", she said, as she smiled at him.

"But I'm not in the mood, can you comprehend that, Lila?", he said.

"I don't know what gives? What is the matter? Whatever did I do to you?", she asked, politely.

Arnold groaned, stopped and stared at Lila with a glare. "You just simply, didn't care a shit about me! When we were dating, you were in your own little world, thinking only about you! While I was an egoistical jerk thinking you could ever like me for who I was, and when you saw the opportunity you broke my heart by saying I deserved my grandma's death! Since then I found no explanation to keep our relationship going!".

Lila looked pale and horrified, but recovered slightly. "I'm ever so certain I did not say such disgusting things!", she said, shaking her head.

"You were high, that's why you don't even remember!", Arnold said.

"I was not!", she replied, unsure, and nervous, looking to both sides.

"You had high levels of cocaine everyday with me not knowing, thanks to Sid, and that suddenly caused one day and everyday to make you get up from bed at 2 am in the morning and going to the streets in your pajamas. You wouldn't even let me sleep, you would take the keys of the boarding house with you and I would have to catch you and return you to my bed!", he explained.

"Was not!", she replied, again nervous.

He slapped his forehead and sighed. "Look, can we drop this? I'm seeing Helga and she needs me, and she needs now my attention. Either you help me or you go the fuck away!".

"How rude! I should call security!", Lila replied.

"You what?", he asked, suddenly aware of her real intentions.

"I-I… what did I say?", she asked.

"You said you were going to call security. Whatever that means, I didn't do anything to you", Arnold replied. "Goodbye".

He turned around and walked to the cafeteria. But Lila followed him and tackled him to the ground again.

"Look at me! Look!", she said.

"Lila, stop it!", he tried to pull away, through gritted teeth. "Help! Help me!".

She grabbed him firmly, scooted close to him and pouted. "You can't escape from me now, hunk!".

"Hel-MMM", he couldn't finish because she kissed him.

Even if he struggled, he couldn't get off her grip so easily. He suddenly started to feel all his hormones raising, his manhood raising and a sudden feeling that he wanted to do her in so many ways he couldn't possibly imagine.

But then, there was Helga, his Helga, and he couldn't bare to break her heart. He loved her so much. Her laugh, her smile, her scent, her nicknames, the feeling to be in the right place with the right woman everyday. With a sudden unknown force, he pushed Lila away with all his might and, with the opportunity in hand, he ran away as fast as he could. Lila just stood there, astounded. She ran after him.

"Wait for me, Arnold, my love!", she said, as she laughed like a maniac and snorted.

* * *

**To be continued...**


End file.
